So lately I’ve been trying to connect with my higher self, for like the a hundredth time just to put it out there. At some point in my life I thought I got it right but somewhere along the road, I hit a bump and landed on a ditch and now here I am trying to pick my face from the ground. Again!
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Am literally juggling the fears of surviving my 20’s as a yet to be established self-entrepreneur, being a girl in the 21st century..PS that’s work!…having paranoia issues about how my job life as a player in the quite tenacious construction industry is catching up fast and finding the ‘right one’ before I live my own version of Being Mary Jane.
Dear life, breather please! Yet how I manage to house such horrendous gigantic thoughts at a time when I should be bungee jumping from escarpments in Colombia *if there’re any* and having the time of my life…unfathomable! Or maybe not.
You see guys, am quite thee “perfectionist” when it comes to things I pursue and maybe also at putting myself in a pre-ulcer state of mind as some of you are probably thinking right now but no….it’s just seeking success in a “perfection” overall.
I’ve quoted the word above because sometimes I get confused if it’s truly the case or am just living through another play of the ‘hoods’…teen hood…the twenties…
Arguably there’s a thin line between perfection and confusion and more often than not we get lost trying to grope our way through life. Now, it’s worse if you have a raging tiger inside you that wants success like a maniac and is trying to break out before it’s “too late”. Anyone who has been extremely passionate about pursuing a certain course in their life and feels cocooned understands my dilemma. It’s crazy! It’s literally comparable to a genie bottled up.
Sometimes we hope a manual would drop down and show us how to grow up, have fun, manage a young business and still maintain a healthy social life!
A few weeks ago during my meditation spree it occurred to me that we work so hard trying to grow up we forget to live the process. Most of us guys out here want to chase money, settle early, live lavishly which is good but cancerous at the same time.
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Getting old is never the problem friends, growing up is. It comes with a whole set of ingredients that are foreign to many maybe all but have to be mastered because that’s the only exit door, surviving the process.
Being patient with yourself is not the easiest thing but we all need to learn to tame our inner tigers once in a while. Too much drive and passion isn’t healthy either, might lead you to gear desperate moves in the name of chasing a dream.
I find no greater satisfaction than in seeking knowledge and exposure because I strongly rely on giving myself lessons. Self knowledge is the strongest because it puts you out there and it feeds your mind on matters not necessarily mentioned in the confines of a classroom.
So what am I saying here, do not inflict mental and emotional torment upon yourself just because you feel you’re in the age of the oh so mighty boom and bloom,the twenties. Do all you can when you can, if you can with whatever “props” you have and give it time, give it to God. Too much plunge might cause a breakdown and eventually cripple your spirits in false assumptions that you are the problem yet you aint. Your handling technique is just off, but not you.
Embrace change, don’t waste too much energy trying to fight it! Allow it to mold you, grow into it, let it groom you. Adapting to necessary change is relevant in keeping your dream alive. It’s a necessary evil. The faster you give in, the better.
Seek experience, by all means…but don’t kill yourself while at it. Take time to study yourself and find what works for you then merge those different elements with your passion, healthy drive and motivation speed. It will all work out, you’ll survive the dreaded 20’s!
I read a piece the other day that really stuck with me, about an old lady who went back to college to pursue her so wanted degree at the age of 84. She died a week after her graduation, all happy and content nevertheless. Just to quote her final speech to her fellow grads:
“We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing. There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success.”
“You have to laugh and find humor every day.”
“You’ve got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die. We have so many people walking around who are dead and don’t even know it!”
“There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up. If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don’t do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old.
If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight. Anybody can grow older. That doesn’t take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding the opportunity in change.”
“Have no regrets. The elderly usually don’t have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets.”
~Old Lady Rose~
Parting shot, be patient with yourself dear bloomer, you are a dream, still dreaming
Blog: Pitcture This- http://www.picturethis.co.ke/
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