I am 32 and living with a married man in Nairobi. We met and fell in love and after sometime, he moved in with me. He is planning to divorce his wife and probably marry me. However, he has transferred the three parcels of land and a car they have into my name. These are all the properties they own and I suspect he wants to leave her broke and stranded with their two children. I feel bad about this and don’t think it is fair for her. What do I do?
You will never be happy due to guilt. The thought of knowing that you are the reason they divorced will haunt you. Forget about the wealth he is transferring to your name. Just find yourself a single man.
(Kevin Otieno- Maseno University)
If you were genuinely guilty about your sin, you should not have waited for it to go this far. You should have stopped it long time ago. Put yourself in that woman’s shoes.
Never make a man divorce his matrimonial wife and have you in her place. Remember his wife contributed towards this wealth! Why is he rushing into transferring land and car in your name before marrying you? What seems like luck in your sight will haunt you in future my dear sister!
(Pastor Ben Shikuku, Bungoma)
What a rare woman you are! Thanks a lot for your objective thinking. When you do that, a bright marital future awaits you dear. You will also save a fellow woman’s marriage. If you mess her marriage then the same awaits you! Remain sober as you are. God will surely remember you.
(Ouma Ragumo –Sifuyo)
Just imagine if you were this man’s wife and discovered what he had done. Just be sober and do what you would want the other lady to do if she were in your shoes.
What goes round comes around. This man is married and probably with children. Think about those children and leave that man. Get your own man.
It sounds good that you know what is right. Your empathy should lead you into making an informed decision. Talk sense into this man as this is a danger signal. After he is done with you he will move to the next victim.
[Makari Elly, Butere ]
Naomi, do you feel okay when someone abandons his family because of you? Think twice before you act.
(John Mogeni from Keumbu, Kisii)
How sure are you this man would not chase you away and return to his wife? Have you done a legal search of these documents? Be kind to this woman and his children by looking for single guys out there.
(Onyango Outha jauduny)
If you are as genuine as you portray to be then initiate process to transfer those assets to that family (actually to that woman). Those assets do not belong to you so try and acquire other properties as opposed to scavenging on what they have struggled to build. In this life, you will never be happy if the things you do make others unhappy. You were party to all these so now that the scope of damage you have is clear to you there may be only two options; one, do the right thing by giving her what is rightfully hers or two, call a party and celebrate at having succeeded in doing what you sought out to do – to destroy a family. Nobody else can sort this mess but you. Whatever you decide to do I can assure you that you will never know happiness or peace as long as that other family is agonising over your actions.