The Akorino wedding

Their manner of dressing is conspicuous, their style of worship unique; but the uniqueness of the Akorino does not end with their white religious clothing or worship. WAIRIMU KAMANDE finds out that it extends right to their dating and marriage lifeJohana Kamau, a Thika based Akorino youth, intends to wed in April this year.But unlike the ordinary youth who will go ‘hunt’ for a woman from his preferred areas (church, bars, weddings, funerals), approach the girl, hope that she will comply and like you enough to listen to you before she can fianlly accept to go on a date with you, his is a different story all together and so too for other Akorino youths. "When you feel ready to start a family, you approach church elders for approval. Once they are convinced that you are eligible and spiritually mature, the elders give you a form to be filled by the woman you desire to marry," Johana reveals.According to him, an Akorino man cannot be allowed to marry before 25 years. The same applies to women aged below 22 years. "Usually, one is given the form for a period of at most six months to find a suitable woman. The form signifies that one has been granted permission to date as one could land in trouble with the church if he is seen with young women without Miriam Nduta, her husband Isaac Maina and their children. Married Akorino men should always wear a jacket permission to do so. You may return the form as soon as you have identified one to marry," explains Bishop Peter Waruru of the African Mission of Holy Ghost Kenya based in Kenol, Murang’a South.The bride-to-be fills in her name and identification number then, appends her signature to affirm her willingness to marry the man. This way, the woman is not coerced to accepting a marriage proposal.The bishop refutes a popular claim that Akorino marriages are match made."We do not make matches nor receive visions as to who will marry who. Maybe that was the practice in the past but we no longer do so," says Waruru.After returning the form showing consent the church sends two women elders to enquire from the young woman if indeed, she has accepted the young man’s proposal.Proposals"Though aware that I was eligible and could receive a proposal, I was shocked to receive it from a man I did not know," says Miriam Nduta of the proposal made to her by her husband Isaac Maina.She says that Akorino youth are usually given forums to interact but it is not strange to receive proposals from total strangers."He came from Eldoret. I was quite uneasy and gave him a hard time. I declined to sign his form on several occasions as I soul-searched and consulted with elders," Miriam says.She reveals that once a woman accepts the proposal, the man then returns the filled form to the elders.Following this, the man can proceed to the woman’s home to ask for her hand in marriage.At this point, according to Pastor Joram Guchu of Witeithie in Thika, the negotiations take a cultural dimension as any other marriage.Meanwhile, the bride and groom are never to be seen together alone until they get married."The couple’s meeting is chaperoned to avert any possibility of them fornicating," says Maina, Miriam’s husband. The two wedded in 2006.Waruru says that in the event the two engage in sex before they are wedded, they are excommunicated from the church for a period and their wedding stopped.Miriam and Isaac on their wedding day in 2006"If the Holy Spirit reveals to the elders that the two have fornicated, there is nothing to prevent the wedding from being stopped even if it is on the wedding day. The two are dismissed and considered man and wife," adds Guchu.More unique with Akorino weddings is the fact that the date of the ceremony is determined by the bride’s and the best maid’s menstruation dates."Women do not attend church when they are menstruating. Menstruation makes a woman unclean and since the marriage ceremony is holy, it has to be held on a day when both the best maid and the bride are not on their monthly period," Guchu reveals.He adds that an Akorino wedding is strictly conducted on a Sunday as they consider marriage as holy a union as the day.Like other Christians, Akorino brides too wear a white wedding gown but they still wear their white headscarf under the veil.Deviating from other Christian denominations, Akorino men wear a white robe over their wedding clothes.Maina says the robe signifies that the man has graduated to another level of maturity. It is only worn on special occasions and in church only.And while other Christians wear marriage bands on their ring fingers once wedded, Akorino couples instead have the bride wearing a white sash tied round her bust by the groom. "The white cloth and under garments are all bought for the bride by the groom," discloses Maina.The man, Waruru says, does not wear anything to signify the commitment. However, he is not supposed to be seen without a blazer coat once he is married.Suiting up"The coat or blazer differentiates an Akorino married man from an unmarried youth. Failure to wear such indicates there is a problem in the marriage," he says, explaining why Akorino men are always in suits. The woman is also not supposed to stay without the garment around her chest. Asked whether the women feel discriminated against by the church rules requiring only them to wear a sign of commitment and considering them unclean when menstruating, Miriam says they have no qualms as this is dictated in the Bible. Waruru further explains that an Akorino youth is not allowed to marry a non-Akorino.Bishop Peter Waruru and wife Ruth Njoki. The woman must wear a shash on top of her clothes to show that she is married"There are different denominations of the Akorino faith and it is only among the groups that a young man or woman is allowed marry. If it occurs that one has identified a mate in a denomination other than the Akorino, then the non-member has to convert. But one has to give convincing reasons why he could not find a suitable mate among the Akorino. Deviation from this, results to the youth being suspended for some months," says Waruru.Formal marriage is compulsory for any Akorino member who hopes to hold a leadership post in the church. The strict rules, Waruru believes, help minimise marital problems.Values"We try our best to instil in our youth values that make couples be committed to their relationship," says Waruru."By having men scrutinised by elders before being allowed to search for a wife, women are protected from exploitation by uncommitted men," adds Miriam.She, however, concedes that being an Akorino does not necessarily translate to a marriage without challenges."It is mutual respect that keeps people together. Without this, the marriage is bound to break however strict the church may be," cautions Ruth Njoki, Bishop Waruru’s wife.Waruru and Njoki have been married since 1974 and though they were not members of the church initially, they converted and formalised their marriage.Marital challenges not withstanding, Waruru and Guchu say they have witnessed few separations among Akorino’s owing to the strict moral guidelines."Rarely do Akorino’s separate. Having declared your relationship before people and God, the shame will be too much to bear. Couples opt to stay together,"concludes Miriam.

The Akorino wedding

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