If you're lonely when you're alone, you're in bad company

“If you're lonely when you're alone, you're in bad company.”

Jean-Paul Sartre

It was a week in my life where so much had happened in a very short time. I barely had the time to digest one occurrence when another suddenly happened. I felt as though I was in a spinning roller coaster that couldn't stop. So much in my life was being affected including my relationships when a friend timely told me that I needed to shut down everything. Just to take time and reflect on my life. More like put everything that was happening into perspective and prioritize.

I took to the woods. In other words, I shut out the world and intentionally decided to bring the loner in me to life. In a world where communication is important, being offline was a battle I knew I had to win if at all I desired sanity and fruitful relationships. During this point I learnt key things about solitude that I am going to share with you.

Solitude helped me reflect on my life. Having come from a week that was on the fastest lane of life, I needed this precious 'me' time and it gave me the opportunity to get away from distractions for long enough to reflect on my relationships and the course my life was on so as to make changes if any may have been required. It was a time to slow down and just be, a time to breathe and get away from the myriad of distractions in the form of technology and people.

It was at this time in the woods that I actually got to have fun. Just being in touch with nature and listening to nature it was a moment in my life I cannot exchange for another. It was both therapeutic and euphoric. Doing the things I have always loved to do without anyone telling me what is right or what is wrong or just simply being confined to societal preferences of behavior was the most liberating experience of it all. You get to be free and create your own rules as you go and most importantly grow.

One of most important lessons I learnt while 'away' was that solitude actually has a bearing on your self-esteem. In a world where one is constantly bound to the expectations of others, this was an experience that let me build a better relationship with myself and remember the little things that light me up. As I came to learn, to have a great relationship with anyone you first of all need to have a great relationship with yourself.

Lastly, this was a time of the rebirth of my creativity. It was a time when all I wrote was considered if not a masterpiece something noteworthy. When the whole world became silent and distractions ceased, I regained my focus and boost my creativity.

This, as Martin Buber put it, was the moment and time of purification.

 “Knowing how to be solitary is central to the art of loving. When we can be alone, we can be with others without using them as a means of escape.” -Bell Hooks