My wife is angry because I said a celebrity is beautiful

I wish I had never said anything because it’s just a silly celebrity crush and doesn’t mean anything

Dear Coleen

My son has a crush on a celebrity and showed me a picture of her and I agreed that she was a pretty girl.

Since then, my wife has been acting strangely.

She got angry when my son was watching videos of the actress – even though they weren’t inappropriate – she has been short with me all week and I want things to go back to normal.

I wish I had never said anything because it’s just a silly celebrity crush and doesn’t mean anything, but she seems hurt and I don’t know how to make her feel better.

Coleen says

Maybe she’s just feeling insecure and this has made her feel worse. I used to feel this way when I saw my husband Ray, who’s a musician, in a show that also featured young sexy dancers in skimpy outfits.

The bit I couldn’t get through to him was that all I needed was a reassuring hug or for him to say, “You know what? They can dance around wearing whatever they want, but I love you”.

Looking back, I was probably being unreasonable and you probably think your wife is being unreasonable too. But if you feel a certain way, logic doesn’t really come into it.

Maybe all you have to do is offer her a bit of reassurance – it might take just once or it might take a bit little bit longer.

Say, “Yes, she’s a pretty actress, but she’ll never be you”.

And ask her if there are actors or celebs out there that she finds attractive – if there are, does it mean she doesn’t love you?

If she thinks about it that way, maybe she’ll get it.