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Do rebound relationships work?

Relationships
 Do rebound relationships work? (Photo: iStock)

There’s no known timeline for healing after a breakup, and much as people would say it is not okay to jump from this to that relationship, we can all agree that people heal differently and how fast depends on what the person does, wants, and for how long. Heartbreaks are emotionally challenging and stressful and require some good mental work.

Rebounds, or rebound relationships, are those that one has immediately after a heartbreak. They might have not gotten over the other person completely, but have their reasons for accepting to get into another relationship without wasting time.

People have had rebounds and they worked for them for good, while others simply ‘use’ such relationships to heal before they get into serious and long-term ones.

Rebounds are good, much as societal moral cops will warn anyone not to get themselves into such arrangements because one is apparently not over their ex and they need a good time to reflect and heal. But having someone’s shoulder to lean on after a nasty breakup really helps drain emotions?

There’s that aspect of losing oneself after a breakup because of the time, amount of sacrifice and emotional attachment one had. But having a rebound has had very positive psychological outcomes.

Someone is able to feel better about themselves, loved and appreciated and in a way forget about the previous relationships. Words of affirmation and assurance are most people’s love language and that’s how rebounds come in handy.

Being in love, whether long-term or short-term, has a way of bringing out the best in a person. Mourning over a failed relationship for 90 days won’t make you strong or heal completely. Get over it and find the next available person and fall in love, again.

Rebuild yourself with a new partner and have an experience that might just turn out to be something you really missed in the other relationship that you’re so stuck on.

You can find your potential in a rebound. Ignore the boring songs of healing, its process and its timeline. Who told you the sooner you get into another relationship after a heartbreak, the shorter it lasts? Lies. There’s no written rule about how soon or fast one should bounce back after a breakup.

Still, it is never a guarantee that the longer you take time to heal, the better your next relationship will be. The rebound effect could be positive or negative. Get into it anyway - risks are good for love and life.

It’s the confidence of someone who gets into a rebound without a care about who says what, that makes the whole thing worth their time. It replaces the void of the other person and builds one’s confidence in loving and being loved again by another better one.

Flirting, sexting and just having back-to-back harmless coffee dates in their own way rebounding. Rather than locking oneself up and crying rivers and oceans, why not just get out there and meet people and have fun? Doesn’t hurt, does it?

People will tell you to wait and heal but you’re the wearer of the shoe. It’s definitely you who knows where it pinches and how bad. Do you - society will adjust.

Even if it lasts for 33 or 17 days, make the best out of the 33. After all, it’s just a rebound. Just don’t go into it heads over heels lest you get broken completely. A day at a time and you’ll find a therapy in it that works for you.

See, the stability or longevity of a relationship is never about its rebound status. It’s just all about how healthy and real it can get, over time. It’s about the compatibility of the partners and how they want to make this whole thing work, for them. So if it feels good, makes you feel whole and appreciated, go for it.

Sex, to some people, is one of the ways to heal and move on faster. Rebounds can be purely sexual and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. When grownups meet and decide to just have a casual relationship with no strings attached but beneficial to either or both of them, who are we to judge?

 As said earlier, people heal differently so if that’s their therapy, so be it. Have a solid rebound for sex and have an experience of a lifetime. Whatever happens after that, deal with it when it does. Live, in the moment.

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