Ladies, do not play wife yet, have fun!

Ladies, do not be in a hurry to play ‘wife’ to your man unless he has put a ring on it. By a ring, I mean a marriage band, not an engagement ring. Some of these men are good at ‘engaging’ women longer than two presidential terms in Kenya. Woe unto you if you are among those engaged for experimental purposes. That ring will send away potential suitors for a whole decade only for your man’s heart to decide to fall out of love with you.

For a whole decade, you have spent your weekends in his house doing the common ‘thorough’ cleaning and cooking him a whole week’s meal. You exhaust your sexy back by bending it all through the weekend trying to scrub the dirt off his walls and stains off his Savco jeans that he had on all week.

He then stretches his legs on the couch as he watches that boring football match and yawns as he reminds you to make his favourite dish, chapati. Because you think you love him, you do all that with a smile on your face thinking it is your duty while your own house is in a mess and you are thinking of how to contact ‘mama fua’ to come to your rescue at a fee.

Sweetheart, I repeat, do not play wife if you do not have a marriage band, not in this era. If he invites you over for the weekend, enjoy the time. I mean, eat, drink and sleep all you can with the TV remote in your hand. Do not wake up early to prepare any breakfast, if he cannot make it himself, then make him buy it from the nearest fast food restaurant. Do not do the dishes, how does he do them during the weekdays when you are away anyway?

Get up, take a shower, plan your day and take off. Remember to leave the dirty dishes in the sink and the dirty laundry in the laundry bag. He is a man after all, he should know how to manage his own house before he gets a wife. Let him ‘step on the frame’ if he thinks you are lazy. There is no way you will play wife as he plays undecided boyfriend with you.

All yee ladies out there who are not yet ‘wifed’ but are in relationships, verily verily I say unto you. Though shall not enter the kingdom of marriage single handedly. Like a bicycle, for a marriage to succeed, both peddles must be at work. You cannot peddle one side hoping you will make it after all.

At some point, you will get fed up after wasting not just your time but energy too. The current generation of men is full of sissies who belong under their parents’ roofs but are lucky enough to have their own roofs. Do not be part of his poor upbringing!

If you meet any of them, help them play their game and beat them while at it. Otherwise you will just be among those who came, saw but never concurred! Say no to relationship slavery.