A heartfelt letter to the First Lady

Dear Your Excellency First Lady,

I have never written before to a First Lady, so I hope the above title will suffice for my missive.

(I did write to a 'Dear Margie' once, though, when I had cleared high school and this young lady called Wambui had broken my heart).

Anyway, it is a sunny Sunday morning as I write this letter to you. All the roads around here are blocked because of the Stanchart Marathon. (Must you running folks always block the highways? Why can't people kimbia huko kichakani? I'm kidding).

I know you understand charity marathons because, every year, you have the wildly popular 'First Lady's' marathon that raises a ton of money for your 'Beyond Zero' initiative that buys clinics so that disadvantaged (by distance) Kenyan mothers get to give birth in mobile clinic facilities.

And infant mortality in Kenya is reduced to zero. That is heroic heart.

But what is the use of all this when the Ministry tasked with the actual governmental responsibilities misplaces Sh888 million meant for the care of poor pregnant Kenyan mothers? Or gives Sh1 billion contracts to connected companies to supply 'clinic' containers that then lie in a state of rust in yards?

Or should we go break an opening red ribbon for 'Mariakani Mausoleum Container Maternity' and ask poor Kenyan mums to go for their monthly clinic at the yards?

This Ministry also seems to have misplaced half a billion shillings meant for the management of HIV.

That money is enough to treat 20,000 Kenyans living with the condition per year. How heartless can anyone be, to tell babies and fellow wananchi in need of medication to 'go die' by stealing money meant for maternity and medicine? Satan has a special seat waiting for you folks in hell, because you are His devils on earth.

Madam First Lady, I wrote to you because you are the first available, actual and seemingly accessible First Lady this beautiful (if you're rich!) country has ever had. Your digital and amiable hubby, who also happens to be our president said – 'Ngai! Now whaddya want me to do about corruption?' as his men charged with vice eradication played blame pong on television.

I felt despair, then remembered, even as a lapsed Catholic, that the Holy Mother Mary intercedes with her son, Jesus. My own late dad was a hot-tempered Kisii man, and my gentle mum, alas also long gone, would intercede for us kids (for more of that story, do get Manoah Esipisu, a most poetic name, to lend you 'Meet the Omtitas' which publisher Mwazemba gave him some time back).

Be our brave 'Michelle Obama.' Tell your in-laws that Sundales International – it sounds like a kindergarten for expatriates' kids – operating as a 'special needs' group leaves a sour taste all around. Kwanza Kathleen coming on TV to explain how she is part of 'disadvantaged women.' Ngai! What will a mother in Mathare say?

I can only run one marathon per year, and the First Lady's has been my favorite for its cause. But our leaders are so heartless, they couldn't care less if the common Kenyan lives or dies. Maybe from next year, we should all just participate in the Mater Heart Run instead.

Because, in this country, it is a national heart that is missing. Or, perhaps, it just got corrupted.