My husband is boring in bed and can only be aroused by looking at other women but not me

I’ve been married for just over four years and have a one year old daughter. To be honest, I’ve always found love making with my husband boring, but now it’s worse than ever.

All he’s interested in are porn videos and then me satisfying him after he’s watched them. There’s no kissing and no foreplay.

I’m in the mood for sex a lot of the time, but he just ignores me. It leaves me feeling angry and depressed, and my resentment towards him is growing by the day.

I have talked to him about how I feel, but it’s all been in vain. Please help me.

Coleen says

He’s making you feel worthless because the only time he’s aroused is when he’s watching porn. It sounds like he’s in a sex rut and has stopped making any effort, which is a huge mistake.

It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been together, you have to keep making an effort to turn each other on and to maintain intimacy. A quickie is fine now and again, but not every time if you’re not getting anything out of it.

I know you’ve tried talking to him, but try again and this time say that being unhappy in bed is starting to affect how you feel about him generally. It’s making him less attractive to you and you’re questioning whether you want to stay married to him. He needs a wake-up call to realise how important this is to you.