You can't blame your parents for your problems...PLUS other advice from 50-year-olds
DEAL WITH YOUR CHILDHOOD BAGGAGE BEFORE YOU BECOME A PARENT
SEE ALSO :Go for surrogacy at your own risk5. Your spouse isn’t you. You will never agree 100 per cent on everything and that should be OK I have learned that my husband and I are very different people. Immediately I got married I thought I would make my husband like my dad but I learned that he is a different person. We view life differently and came from different backgrounds. Initially I used to get angry but I have learned that I have to allow him be who he is and support him to support me. When I try to force him to be someone that he isn’t, it creates a lot of conflict. But when I allow him to be who he is and remind myself that we are both unique and different, that we came from different backgrounds, we are happier. Do that as long as it is not negative behaviour from them. As long as the person is responsible, you need to know that your spouse is not you. You cannot think the same, you cannot do things the same way. Support him to support you.
I FEAR THAT I WILL NOT HAVE DONE ENOUGH BY THE TIME I DIE6. It is all in vain if you don’t make a positive difference in society I have come to learn that the title, power, privilege or visibility that comes with being the chief strategist of one of Kenya’s largest and most influential human rights organisations is useless, if it is not used to protect the rights and freedoms of all Kenyans. What turns yesterday’s freedom fighter into today’s dictator is simply that they have lost their ability to see the public interest beyond their personal interests, ego and fears. 7.That you won’t control everything no matter how hard you want things to work out a certain way.
HE /SHE MAY BE A BAD PARTNER BUT DON’T DENY YOUR CHILD THEIR PARENT9. Without trying out new things, you will never discover ‘your’ thing. It is always good to make projections. In the year 2000, no one would have imagined what the media landscape would look like today. So always look ahead and imagine what your career will look like in the future. Have a rough road map. Creating images ahead of time and then believing in those images is very powerful. Two decades ago, I was somewhere with a friend doing a mock interview with a video camera given to me by my younger brother. I had just finished my studies and was trying to figure out what to do next. In the mock interview, I was asking him about issues in the banking industry. Fast forward years later, I was in the media and won CNN African Journalist of the Year Award and my friend ended up as one of the top bankers in the country. My friend and I had no idea where we were going, but we created an image. I attribute it to the image that we created two decades ago. Create those images in your mind and try them, like that mock interview we had. Try things and you will discover your talents. That is one lesson I have learned. Step out and do things. In the process, you will discover your raw talent. 10. Allow the other parent to be in their child’s life if they want to Always have both parents involved in the lives of the children no matter what. Even if as a couple you go through turbulent times and your relationship collapses, always have both parents involved in the lives of the children. It gives the children a balance. No matter what happens, parenting should be a shared responsibility. 11. No one will make you happy, only you can Happiness is an inside job. Resolve matters on the inside of you and you will not be dependent on outside circumstances to be happy. You will not need outside things to shape you. Your world view will be changed positively, and even without a meal, you will be happy. 12. Never stop learning, that is how the money will come Never go looking for money. What you do instead is to fix yourself by constantly improving yourself. Learn, educate yourself, try out new things and if you sort out all that, money and opportunities will look for you. Education is power but learning is a superpower.
GRASP THE FIVE WALLET RULE, IT WILL BE THE BEST THING YOU LEARN13. Your greatest path is simply what you decide it to be… All my education after O-levels has been curated to help me excel in business. Not degrees. I have just picked and chosen what I wanted to learn. When we talk about people coming out of universities and lacking jobs, I wonder, what is it that they are being taught that they cannot convert into some value and get paid? You can learn what you want and what you need to grow. Define what you want and pursue it relentlessly. There is no non-professional career. What is important is that you are solving someone’s problem with whatever skill you have, and they are willing to pay you. Get the knowledge, education, experience and exposure to be a problem-solver for problems that exist for people who are willing and able to pay you. The way of work is changing. Decide what you want to be. Define what you like to do and get on the path for it. 14. The five wallet rule will save you a lot of financial strife. Wallet one: Pay yourself. What are the things you love to do? You can plan for some treats once in a while. I have learned that you can plan to have the lifestyle that you want. Choose your life, own it, learn it, work it. Wallet two: Pay for essentials. Your essentials are the things that you need to pay for. Wallet three: Pay into your empowerment account. Empowerment is for the achievements that you want, such as a certain programme you want to enroll in. Wallet four: Pay into your emergency fund Wallet five: Pay into elevation account. Your elevation account is based on the universal law that what you give will come back to you. It is having an account for giving back, so you allocate a certain percentage for the needy, for a relative, for when you have a funeral. It is an account to help someone else breathe easier because you exist. 15. We waste a lot of precious time Many times we are not cognisant of how we use our time. If you are employed, you work for 8 hours. There are 24 hours in a day. What are you doing with the rest? What are you doing with your Saturday and Sunday? It had better be something that nourishes your life, otherwise, you are wasting precious time. For income, you must be willing to discover what your talent is and then manage your time in 16. You are grown now, don’t waste life blaming your childhood for your life now Don’t blame your current circumstances on the way you were brought up. As a human being, your power is in the present. There is nothing that happened in your past that can stop you except that which you choose. We can’t keep blaming our past for our failures today. Remove all the blame of other people and shame of things you may have done in the past. I have learned that my mistakes are my lessons. I learn from them, I forgive myself, I forgive people and move on. It is what you think that you become. Not what other people think. You cannot stop people from thinking. It is very sad to allow people to stop you with their thoughts. Align your thoughts with what you want. 17. Live life fully. Who knows if you will be here tomorrow? Enjoy life and work. If you are at home, be at home. If you are at work, be at work. If you are at play, be at play
Do not miss out on the latest news. Join the Standard Digital Telegram channel HERE.