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When you anticipate grief

  Humans can think ahead and strategise so anticipating a loss should be no different [Courtesy, Freepik]

Life often throws us curveballs and sometimes, those curveballs take the form of anticipatory grief. You know, that feeling of mourning before the actual loss hits you?

Yes, it happens. Humans can think ahead and strategise so anticipating a loss should be no different. This could be the case of a dying loved one or even the loss of a job.

The degrees of pain may vary but that doesn’t make the loss any easier. This will show up as sadness, especially if you are the one taking care of a loved one and their condition deteriorates right before your eyes.

It may also come in the form of fear. You’re not sure if you have enough resources to give them the best health care or if you’re giving them enough time as they near their death bed.

It is a wild ride of emotions. It’s like being on a rollercoaster where the twists and turns are unpredictable. One moment, you might be laughing at a funny memory the next, you’re drowning in a sea of tears. Embrace it. Why? Because it’s okay to feel like a mixtape of emotions.

But you don’t have to suffer in silence. Your friends and family are your emotional safety net. Share your feelings, let them know when you need a hug or a good laugh, and don’t be shy about leaning on their shoulders.

Music has magical powers. Create a playlist that lifts your spirits and makes you want to dance, even on the gloomiest days. Imagine it as your soundtrack for battling anticipatory grief. Let music be the wind beneath your wings when you need a lift. This is a tried and tested way to help heal the soul, so don’t ignore it just because it sounds corny.

Sometimes, the best way to deal with grief is to express it. Write a letter to your loved one, whether they’re still with you or not. Pour your heart out. Or keep a journal where you can jot down your thoughts and feelings as they come.

And just like asking for directions when you’re lost, seeking help from a therapist or counsellor can provide valuable guidance. They can equip you with coping strategies and a safe space to navigate anticipatory grief in the healthiest way possible.

While it’s essential to prepare, don’t forget to cherish the 'now' moments. Celebrate small victories and savour the simple joys while you still have the chance.


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