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I am heavy: My Pregnancy Journey just began...

Living
 Photo:Courtesy

Being pregnant with twins is the best feeling ever….to check into the hospital and to have the doctor affirm that what you are carrying is not just a blessing of a child, but that of two.

I am rubbing my tummy interchangeably as I type this piece.

Working towards getting a child, realizing that you successfully got one, and rearing the thought of finally becoming a parent….to have a being look up to you in not only more ways than one, but in all ways one could think of….these are priceless moments.

And so because I’m finding it hard to capture this moment for you……mainly because I am not yet heavy with twins, but heavy with a multitude of thoughts, I choose to draw back to the basics of the writing of this piece.

This heaviness though!

This heaviness is like that of twins carefully sucking life through the placenta of a mother who readily gives….readily gives….readily gives to the children that are now her own.

And I readily give to my multitude of thoughts….…

It has been a whole year ever since I successfully put down a piece of writing.

In the past year I could barely go beyond two paragraphs when I began typing….whether on a bus home…..at the back of a taxi seat….or as I strolled along the serene paths that my green homeland Kericho presents.

Pause: Let’s talk about Kericho.

Whoever has been to my motherland can swear that this is a place to behold! The carpet of green tea, and if you’re lucky you’ll find sight of the purple tea lawning (this word does not exist in the English dictionary) the land where it lies. Oh my motherland!

Sigh, Kericho, you deserve a place in heaven…very close to the Mercy Seat.

Back to the heaviness….my multitude of thoughts that drive me to labor…you my reader would imagine that I’m out to list down a million and one of them here. A thought at a time, I will.

However….with each piece of writing that will come forth henceforth, you’ll behold of my twins.

There is this tranquility that comes with knowing that you are where you want to be at that present moment in life. I have not written much in the recent past, but I acknowledge that I’m in God’s perfect timing of doing something magnificent with the multitude of thoughts He has conceived in me.

It is almost deafening to imagine that the life one lives is a wasted output of what others throw at you…..but a sweet victory to acknowledge that whilst many have failed to conquer the sand thrust in the grave as your soul is condemned to an utter standstill, you are here stepping on it and rising above it….rising to the very ground that allows the condemner and the condemned to fight on the same battle field.

Not being able to do what you love doing can have such effects. Where you feel as though your validity and relevance is going six feet under, but the beauty of it is in refusing to let it die. In refusing to let the candle burn out.

So whatever it is that you do without being asked to….that thing(s) that drives you to achieve milestones without the nag of a deadline….that one thing that you are convinced is the reason for your heart to beat…..that one person that you know you can’t live without….GO FOR IT!

 

In between now and heaven: http://binticheptoo.blogspot.co.ke

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