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How to handle being the third wheel best friend

Girl Talk - By Lolita Bunde | December 1st 2020 at 11:35:00 GMT +0300
You don’t always have to hang out with them when you won’t enjoy their company and they yours (Shutterstock)

Sometimes being in a group of three friends can be difficult. It may seem like the three of you are tight but in the real sense one of you will always feel left out. Probably you will find yourself lagging behind when you go to the mall, you don’t share common interests as much as the two do and you are constantly hitting them up for meet ups.

You may not be assertive enough or as outgoing as the two of them to claim your place in the friendship hence the reason you are feeling like a third wheel.

If you find yourself third wheeling in your friendship circle, here are some ways you can handle the situation:

  • Talk to them

More often than not, your friends may not be aware that they are making you feel like a third wheel and you can try bringing it to their attention.

Communication is always the key, you might also learn things you didn’t know about yourself in the process or how they feel. Suffering in silence will not change the situation not unless you are planning on walking away altogether.

  • Try hanging out with them individually

It is okay to feel disconnected with someone and, if it bothers you, you can consider hanging out with the other two of your friends individually. You can invite them separately for maybe coffee or lunch and try to connect on your own level. The situation might not change instantly but at least they might start seeing you.

It may seem like the three of you are tight but in the real sense one of you will always feel left out (Shutterstock)
  • Introduce a fourth friend

It is only human for people to connect in pairs and when your only two friends seem to be absorbed into one another, you can introduce a fourth friend to the group. A fourth friend will keep you company and you won’t feel as lonely or like you are third wheeling. This may also create the much needed balance in your friendship circle.

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  • Do not stress

In some cases it might eat you up why your friends don’t make you a priority but if they are not aware of your feelings, do not sweat it. You don’t always have to hang out with them when you won’t enjoy their company nor they yours. You can stay at home, watch a movie or finally join your workmates for those beers you have been declining.

  • Let them Go

It’s okay to let go of the friendship if it’s not working for you anymore. If you feel the situation you are in is stressing you and they are not willing to do anything about it, you can back off and drop them. It may be difficult at the start but you will be okay and you will find people you can connect with on a more personal level.

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