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How to not lose yourself in your relationship

Relationships - By Rachel Murugi | April 3rd 2020 at 08:05:00 GMT +0300
Taking some time from your partner to pursue your hobbies rejuvenates you (Shutterstock)

Have you ever met someone so consumed by their relationship they even forget they exist? Such is the story of my college roommate who fell into this trap so deep it was hard to bring her back. As freshmen, she got into a relationship with a senior year student who had so many demands.

Before we knew it, she was missing classes, avoiding our girl group and always spending time in the man's hostel as she did chores. It wasn't until we noticed how her grades had dropped that we had to give her a wakeup call.

Here are some ways that will help you ensure you don't get out of touch with yourself.

Keep your hobbies

Hobbies define you and what you like doing for fun. For some, they can even turn it into a business. When you keep and practice your hobbies often, you get to spend quality time with yourself. Additionally, you're able to perfect a skill you've been working on and get a sense of achievement once you keep on perfecting your art.

Taking time alone from your partner to pursue your hobbies will rejuvenate you and make you appreciate yourself more.

You can easily lose your self-worth when you are the one constantly compromising (Shutterstock)

Cultivate other outside relationships (family and friends)

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Friends and family keep you accountable and act as your support system even when your whole world revolves around someone. Being able to spend time without your partner and meeting new people boosts your confidence, as well as give you stories to narrate to your partner.

Your networking skills are also sharpened along the way. Many people have an issue with this and get absorbed into their partners because of trust issues. In all truth, a partner who trusts you understands the value of having healthy relationships outside your romantic relationship.

Don't be the only one who compromises

For the relationships which have one person taking the bow on a daily basis, tougher times lie ahead. You can easily lose your self-worth when you are the one taking the blame for everything in the name of creating a balance in your relationship. You should know that, in no time you may grow emotionally weary, which will end up making you dislike your relationship.

Make future plans that may not involve your partner

Whether it's that travel destination that your partner dislikes or a dish you've wanted to prepare which your partner is intolerant to, do it. You shouldn't expect to be similar to your partner as both of you have different tastes. To keep your love burning, do things on your own, even if your partner won't join in, and be happy about it!

Practice self-love

Being in a relationship is not meant to usher in the season where you fail to care of your well-being. Buy yourself the gift you've been coveting or do something that will make you happy and rejuvenated. This will put you in a better position to even be better in your relationship.

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