Seven tips on dating a feminist

In the recent years, relationship dynamics have really changed.

Social issues such as feminism, pro-black movements and other societal aspects have transformed the way we date and relate to each other.

When it comes to dating a feminist, certain things must be considered. Forget all the lies and fears some ignorant people continue to perpetuate that, ‘oh dating a feminist can’t work,’ ‘oh feminists make the worst partners,’ and so on and so forth.

While there are extreme feminists out there with quite strong opinions and are stubborn to see past their beliefs, there, equally, is another group of feminists who are strong, independent and caring women who happen to be in happy relationships and marriages.

So should you find yourself at a cross road with a feminist who you think you want to pursue, here are some essential tips to keep in mind when considering dating an empowered woman.

The first step to dating a feminist is understanding what this means in the first place. You should be able to understand and accept that society has been based on patriarchy ever since. If you feel as though women and men have been equal and have had equal opportunities all through, this is likely a basis for you and your date to clash.

In this day and age, you need to be more aware of the things that have been happening in the world as far as gender roles and expectations are concerned. Be aware of male privilege and some of the challenges that women have been facing. You may not know all the details of the movement, but you should at least be interested in what it all means.

Part of the feminist movement is giving both sexes equal opportunity and removing gender biases. This means that, she supports that men should still have a voice and not be belittled. Knowing this, you shouldn’t have to walk on eggshells just because you are dating a feminist. Communicate and let her know when you are uncomfortable with something and don’t feel obliged to do everything she says just to protect her feelings. Remember that she still wants you to be a gentleman all the same.

Women in the past have been treated like second hand citizens who should not have a voice. Women have felt like they have no power to influence real change in society. Feminism therefore gave women a voice and a chance to express how they truly feel.

A crucial aspect of dating a feminist, therefore, is listening to her and letting her express herself. This way, you will also be able to learn a thing or two and understand why women are so passionate about change in society.

A guaranteed way of getting in the bad books of your feminist crush is making sexist jokes. Feminists are particularly sensitive to jokes that are misogynistic and sexist in nature. Saying things like, ‘do you hate men?’ or using the ‘b word’ at any point could possibly make her completely disinterested in you. Be more sensitive when it comes to these types of jokes because she will definitely not find them funny.

One big topic surrounding dates is who should pay for it. In the past, societal expectations are that a man should always pay for the date at all times. This is considered a true show of confidence for the man. When feminism changed the game, more women were open to paying for the date and destroying dating expectations. Since the movement champions for equality, feminists believe that women can settle the bill just as much as men. So if she wants to pay for the date, let her do so. Don’t take this as a sign of weakness on your part.

The best tip for dating a feminist is being supportive of her goals, dreams and ambitions. These days, women are more empowered than ever to work hard and to secure a future for themselves. Women no longer want to fully depend on men for everything. If you are planning on dating a feminist, understand that she is passionate about her goals in life and would most definitely appreciate a man who genuinely supports her rather than one who competes with her.

Don’t be so fixated on the societal norms that have existed since time in history. Men are expected to carry out certain roles and always be the protector. However, when it comes to dating a woman who is a feminist, her mindset is different. Be more understanding if she doesn’t want you to change the bulb for her or when she doesn’t enjoy being called ‘sweetie.’

Keep in mind that she is genuinely okay with doing some things on her own and that she is not trying to impress you or take over some of your roles. She is fine doing certain things by herself so understand that.