Women, beware of randy 'hyenas' on 'fisibility' prowl

Last weekend as we sat at our usual 'local depot' to analyse the shock that has been the political party primaries, one thing came up. One female candidate, who has sailed through to be her party nominee for a parliamentary seat, has been less than kind to her hubby. She has been perpetrating all manner of decadent behaviour and conduct towards him during the campaign period. Yet, when she clinched the party ticket, she was parading him as a poster boy as he did the obligatory smile for the cameras.

This made us come up with some declarations, we called it May Day Declaration as it was done on the first day of May and secondly 'May Day' is a well-known English phrase pointing out for immediate intervention. What were the declarations?

Flirting is a no-no zone. Many women assume that having a little playful fun at the office with a male workmate can't be too bad, you may rationalise. After all, flirting is fun. We are advising all the women to avoid it like the plague. It's dangerous. If someone flirts with you, ignore it. Those loose coffee suggestions, "naona leo una date" or "leo umetuamulia aje" are some of the phrases that the 'hyenas' use to do their fisibility study.

Secondly, life is full of ups and downs. That's life. But when as a woman you opt to pour out your troubles to someone of the opposite sex, you are putting yourself in a vulnerable position. It may seem harmless. After all, you just needed a shoulder to cry on. If you have got a problem, talk about it with your man. That's your best-ever shoulder to cry on. Not someone who may consider it as an invitation for intimacy. Even if it doesn't start that way, too often it ends that way.

For eons, women have been known to regard men with the same trust as they would the roving estate canine. Now this is the start of the problems. When you are a true friend to someone you never say bad things about them to others. Your man is your best friend and is the last person you should ever talk about negatively. If you have a beef with your honey, talk it out with him and re-create the happier times.

Fourthly, we're living in the digital era and a lot of our things are done online, but we cannot afford to let being digital to derail your relationship with your man. If you think this is harmless, think again. It may start out that way, but it definitely won't end that way. Some women have engaged in what they considered 'innocent talk' with a former boyfriend from high school or college days, or even a stranger, only to end up giving it up.

The other major contention that emerged during the declaration is the women's tendency to put their parents first before their hubby. Your man must always be the number one person in your life. If something wonderful happens to you, like a promotion, a confirmation of a pregnancy, or any other good news, you may be tempted to immediately call a parent to share in the joy. Resist. Let your man be the first to know!

The other major problem that continues to ail the relationships between women and their men is the dress code. 'My dress; my choice', was an activism agenda. But at the home front there is no activism. Ultimately, you may cook your man his favourite food, after all it has been said that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. But that is not all. Serving him well the other special food is very important. To withhold sexual intimacy from your man is akin to withhold tax from the government; quite a grievous offence. If you do this don't be shocked to realise that someone has been helping you out. On this men were equivocal! Now you know.