If you're looking for your husband, ask the campus girl where he's at

If you are looking for your husband or long-time boyfriend, try looking for him at a campus girls’ hostel. I promise you will find him under some girl who ‘slays’ for a living. The average campus girl drew her eyebrows and realised that despite them kissing the sky, the economy is still higher. Upon that realisation, she decided to flash her bits at the only person that could save her-the sponsor; and the husband to the female with a stocking on her head.

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While the wife is at home, in homely clothes, barefoot in the kitchen, the campus girl snakes her way into the sponsor’s phone in the form of nudes and selfies in the best lighting she can afford. She will undoubtedly add cucumber and peach emoticons because she is nasty and crazy like that.

The allure of the campus girl lies somewhere between her not having flabby body parts, the agility of young limbs, and the thrill of the illicit. She is as restless as a bitch on heat and with her comes the adventure of jellyfish, fellatio, Kama sutra and 69, something the wife will frown upon and say, ‘’I have a headache.’’ or even worse, ‘’I’m tired.’’ And so when the weekend comes, he drives his engine and guzzler to the hostels, picks up the twerking slayer and treats her to a night of endless drinking. After, she posts photos on her Instastory downing shots that outnumber her age. She will then head over to ‘her’ room paid for in full by you know who. A condom packet may be ripped for whose with caution. However, for most who only live once, the three-minute man will make a direct deposit and roll over to text the wife, “Out of town for the weekend” and sleep.

Mornings are then spent fighting hang-overs, getting sloppy adulterous seconds, and popping pills. The events are most likely to be repeated throughout the weekend because rent lazima ilipiwe. Of course, not all out of town husbands are on top or under campus girls. That being said, if he is enduring in his out of town escapades, it goes without saying that you are sharing him with a campus girl.