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The ugly bite: My experience with dogs

UREPORT
By Martin Olage | July 27th 2020

They say money can buy you an excellent dog, but only love can make it wag its tail. This isn't the case with Kenyan dogs. Only a chunk of ugali is all they need. Whether it's fresh or stale, that means the least to them. Love to them is a language far beyond their reach. Just as the Korean language is out of Kenyans reach.

I don't know what got into me that made me write an article on dogs. I somewhat hate dogs. Most likely, the ones that have their behaviors deteriorating dangerously. You'll find them dragging their lazy weights behind your back and sniffing you all over. You'll remember the last meal you had was breakfast, and it's 6 pm.

What is this dog sniffing! Let's give it the benefit of the doubt; it was ridiculously distracted by the sight of your new jeans.

Then there are these dogs that will always bark up the wrong tree. They'll rebuke you with their frail barking. For the most part, these are the type of dogs that look fragile and shaggy. You might think they'll drop down a moment later. But bro! These are the worst of them all. You don't want to mess with a force of hunger. Remember your primary school teacher telling you a hungry dog is an angry dog?

YES.

Your teacher didn't fool away your school fees. These types of dogs that look seconds away from death are the quickest to give you the fastest ride to your Creator. I bet you fear dogs as I do. But Bro. Just keep a distance.

I fear dogs. I am talking about the ones that roam the streets. Some of them carry a vast amount of rabies. It doesn't take a significant bite for them to descend you six feet under. They'll be quick to bite you down. When I see them, I always take to my heels. Not that I can't bring them down. Of course, I can fracture their head under the weight of my blow. But I don't want to. I am just keen. I am a tad prompt. I don't want to die of rabies. I want to see my grandchildren. I want to name my first son, Gaveke. Don't ask me what it means. I want to put up a bank account under his name. I'll be depositing money into the account every so often. By age ten he'll be a millionaire. I hear millionaires have funny names. Right?

For those who like dogs, this is to let you know I am part of you-we sailing in the same boat. Our love for dogs is just the same difference. The breed of my choice is Akita. It’s a muscular, double-coated dog, famous for its courage. It’s the type that can guarantee to me the utmost protection. I warrant that.

So after this don't come to my house with lethal force. Remember the government hasn't justified such inhuman moves. But even if you come, I'll hold my ground and tell you, dogs that roam the stress ain't a cup of tea for me.

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