Facts about sleep, sex and intimacy you should know

By Dayan Masinde | 6yrs ago | 3 min read

1. When you go to bed clean and not stinking of sweat or odor. By maintaining good hygiene you excite your spouse to have sex with you. Cleanliness heightens sexiness.

2. Sleep is the highest form of trust; an adult to close ones eyes and be powerless and safe in bed with another adult. A spouse who feels comfortable sleeping with you, trusts you.

3. The quickest way to destroy the marriage bed is for your spouse to suspect you are cheating. It is not enough to be faithful, your spouse must also perceive that you're faithful. Desist from doing things that make your spouse perceive you are cheating even though you're not: Things like keeping secrets, or being extra friendly to people of the opposite gender.

4. When you come home early, you will have enough time to spend with family which will lead to good sleep. Don't give your family the exhausted and hurried you.

5. Make time for intimacy and special time with your spouse. Don't let life rush you to the point your marriage is surviving on quickies and hurried sex. Allow yourselves ample time to make love.

6. Get in to the habit of telling your spouse "Good night" and "Good morning", preferably with a kiss. These words are simple but crucial. When you just sleep or wake up without concluding the day or starting the day right, it shows disregard to your spouse's feelings. The two greatest moments that define a marriage is how each day is started and concluded.

7. Dress for comfort but also dress to arouse and excite your spouse when in bed. Don't look good when you go to work and in public and then fall short to the one person you should visually stimulate.

8. Develop a habit of making out. Yes, married couples need to make out too. Fondle her breasts, kiss, and touch, grab each other, kisses on the skin.

9. Before your spouse sleeps, find out how he/she is emotionally.

10. When you notice your spouse is exhausted, allow him/her to rest and talk when you're both fresh tomorrow. Show that you understand. Just because what you wanted doesn't happen today, doesn't mean it won't happen tomorrow. Don't be alarmed. Your spouse is not going anywhere.

11. Avoid chatting with people on the phone late in the night when with your spouse, avoid TV and social media too. Night is for the one you consider special.

12. Heighten your spouse's self confidence in bed by giving compliments.

13. Don't expect things to be OK in bed between you two, if you have been treating your spouse poorly and rudely during the day.

14. Invest in pillow talks. Pillow talks are not primarily for talking about issues, but for connecting emotionally. Yes, talk about issues when they arise, but focus more on intimate conversations.

15. When your body gets enough rest, you two will enjoy great sex, you will better meet each other's emotional needs.

16. When you do have an infant/s, take turns in looking after the baby so that you give each other space to rest.

17. A tired mind struggles in relationship building. Give a fresh you to your spouse and children.

18. Occasionally deliberately have lazy days where you two as a couple sleep all through, chill in bed, go on a go slow, and don't do anything but enjoy each other’s company. If need be, take a vacation or book a hotel room. Invest in intimacy.

19. In case you notice you two are drifting apart and not connecting as you used to, do not complain and attack your spouse for the change because that will push him/her away or make your spouse defensive. Instead, lure your spouse back to you progressively and naturally. Have good times, laugh, show care, and be easy to talk to. People gravitate to experiences that are safe and light, not forced ones.

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