Restrain your enthusiasm when visiting newborns

By Rozie Juma

Kenya: Babies are bundles of joy and bring a lot of excitement.  During this festive season, there are lots of visits to friends and relatives, and this includes calling on families with newborns.

As soon as you hear that someone dear to you has had a baby, your reflex reaction might be to rush to hospital or to their house to welcome the tot. Remember, however, that the newborn is delicate and needs a safe environment.

Mum and dad too, need to rest since they might be deprived of much-needed sleep, and some time to adjust to life with a newborn and bond with the baby.

There are, thus, certain societal expectations if you plan to visit the newborn baby:

• Only visit when you are invited, whether it is at home or hospital.

• It is prudent that only close relatives and very close friends visit the baby in hospital. The others can visit eight to ten days after the baby is born.

• Before you visit, alert the parents. Call them and let them know you would love to visit at their convenience. Never visit at night.

• re you coughing or have a cold? Please do not visit; infants are delicate and their immunity is weak. If you are recovering from a fever or a cough, or you are catching one, postpone the visit.

• Do not take a toddler with you. Toddlers come into contact with their playmates in school and in their neighbourhood, and are bound to catch infections, which can be easily transmitted to the newborn.

• Make your visit short; don’t spend more than half an hour with the newborn. Remember there are other people, too, who want to visit the baby. 

• Always wash your hands, especially because of the baby’s weak immune system. You could also use a sanitiser before you hold the baby to reduce the chances of exposure to germs.

• If you love perfume, avoid it altogether or use a very mild one. Infants easily get irritated by strong scents and can develop health problems when exposed to chemicals that are not natural.

• Carry some healthy, homemade food, since the parents to the newborn are likely to be exhausted and may not be in a position to prepare something for you. The new mom and dad are already drained and you should not expect to be fed.

• Never comment on the physical appearance of the baby or the mother. Regardless of how the baby looks, she is the most beautiful child to the parents.  As for the mother, she may not get time to style her hair or do her makeup, and it takes time for her weight to return to normal.

• You may have already given a present at the baby shower. It is, however, still nice to take a suitable gift for the newborn baby. It does not have to be expensive; it is the thought that counts.

•             Avoid giving unsolicited advice, even if you have raised your own children. Every child is different. Only provide a solution if the parents ask you a specific question. Otherwise, what worked for you may not always work best for them.