Drunk graduates excited as rain beats them

By MURIMI MWANGI

KENYA: Graduates from a local university shocked revellers at a bar in western Kenya, when they got too drunk to notice they were being rained on. They proceeded to drink themselves silly at the open balcony of the bar in their full graduation regalia.

Prior to the baffling incident, the graduants had been overheard brainstorming on the best way to commemorate their academic journey, which they described as torturous. Apparently, they settled on partying in their gowns after the graduation at their university. 

Academic

“Comrades, we have to make this day memorable. We need to do something foolish, but with an academic twist,” one of the graduants suggested. 

“Why don’t we surprise the villagers by visiting that place where they sell busaa in banana bushes? 

We shall have made history as graduants who certified local brew to be fit for consumption,” recommended another.

They settled for the best local restaurant where they sat at the balcony.

Like many students, they did not have enough money.

Thus they opted to rush to a nearby wines and spirits shop, where they bought potent alcoholic drinks.

 One of them smuggled the drink into the bar by tucking it in his nether region. 

With gowns in a polythene bag, they arrived in the bar and tucked themselves in a corner of the balcony.

As expected, they discussed their long academic journey, women, sports and it turned into a philosophical contest with each one coming up with theories of all sorts.

 So intense were the discussions that they did not notice the drizzle. Before they knew it, it was raining cats and dogs.    “This gown here is evidence enough that I am an academic giant. My guy, I have chewed books,” boasted one of the graduants.

Blessings

A concerned barmaid tried in vain to convince them to move inside the bar. One of the graduants claimed the rain was a shower of blessings, meant to ensure they don’t tarmac like many graduates.

“As a Literature student, I was taught that God traditionally talked one-on-one with his people, which is what is happening now. I won’t let these blessings bypass me.

Satan is a liar,” he declared before sipping his beer, and shaking his head like a mad man.

“I have the powers to read and do all that appertains to my degree! Just see,” he said laughing uncontrollably, as he sipped his beer. 

One by one, the graduands retrieved their gowns and hats and wore them.

Each showed how impressed they were by sipping more alcohol and breaking into rapturous laughter.

They sang and danced with their gowns to the awed patrons as the pounding rain raged on.