A couple of years ago, a trend emerged on social media where ladies explained how Strepsil Lozenges spiced up their bedroom lives. Those who comprehended the bedroom rage that erupted from closed social media groups to the general public explained that the lozenges, which are antiseptics designed to relieve the discomfort of sore throats, were now being used to create a sensational feeling during oral sex.
The cooling menthol from the lozenges, a closely guarded secret among women, left men yearning for more, skyrocketing the demand for Strepsils in local chemists.
In a world that celebrates individuality, sexual liberation, and personal preferences, some revel in traditional practices, while others eagerly explore unconventional ways to enrich their intimate encounters.
“That awkward moment umesunda #strepsils chini ya pillow ukitegea bae atoke bafuni only to enter the bedroom na kumpata anazimumunya mdogo mdogo, ndio utajua mapenzi ni safari na hakuna fare,” lamented a social media user, whose partner had used the lozenges.
Pundits and those interviewed said that in a world where people are increasingly embracing their individuality, the conversations around sexual liberation and personal preferences are becoming more open than ever.
They went on to say that while some people find comfort in traditional sex practices, others are drawn to exploring unconventional ways to enrich their sexual experiences. But regardless of the path they choose, one thing is clear: communication, consent, and mutual enjoyment are the pillars of every intimate encounter.
Sex Coach Muriuki Wanjiru, who runs Climax with Ciru on Instagram and other podcasts, said sex is amazing and people should try new things. “We should stop demystifying sex. We should also stop body-shaming women who have a lot of sex,” she told The Nairobian on the phone.
Baptised Ciru by fans and clients, she said each person’s journey through intimacy is a unique and personal one, and it is essential to recognise and respect the diverse paths people take. “There are online apps that bring people together to enjoy sex and try new things,” Ciru said.
Ciru added that there were also parties where couples were exchanging partners during sex escapades.
“People should enjoy sex,” Ciru said.
Boundaries Redefined: Pleasure without compromise
As the boundaries of sexual expression continue to expand, couples and individuals are eagerly delving into exciting realms to enhance their intimacy. For some, role-playing becomes a gateway to fantasy worlds where they can adopt different personas, sparking a sense of novelty and excitement in their relationships.
Richard, a top communication expert, found himself drawn into a thrilling encounter at a BnB in Kilimani. The woman, in her late forties, invited him to a bedroom filled with an alluring assortment of sex toys.
When Richard asked her what those things were on the bed, she said, “We will handcuff each other in turns. I will tie the rope like I am hanging you to death; when I pull it, you lose your air because you are unable to breathe, and then I will whip you,” she said.
Richard explains that it was not the first time he was invited, arguing that sex toys have become an increasingly common tool to experiment with variety and stimulation during intimate moments.
They offer a safe and enjoyable way for individuals to explore their desires and preferences.
Sensory play has emerged as another avenue for heightened sensations and arousal. Blindfolding, temperature play, and using delicate feathers ignite passions and pleasures like never before, allowing partners to connect on a deeper level.
“People should agree on sex terms early, when they are still courting. Couples should talk and enjoy sex,” Ciru said.
James, who preferred that we use only one name, adds that sometime late last year, a woman asked her to plug her.
“When she told me to plug, I didn’t know what I should do. And then she removed the lubricant and gave me a toy and turned it down; it then hit me that it was anal arousal, something I have never done before,” James said.
However, Ciru said she loves soft BDSM.
“Hard BDSM is tough for me. BDSM is not violent. It trains the man to remain caring and be able to read the body language,” Ciru said.
In the Bedroom Lab: Bold Experiments for Mind-Blowing Pleasure!
Those who have ventured into Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, and Sadism and Masochism (BDSM), have discovered that it transcends societal taboos, offering a path to explore the realms of bondage, dominance, submission, and masochism, ultimately elevating their pleasure to new heights.
“When she moans loudly, know that she is enjoying it and do it more. When he groans more, know that he is enjoying it, and do it more,” Said Ciru.
Ciru said that it’s not just about physical experiences; the power of words plays a central role in kindling desire. Couples engage in erotic storytelling or read erotica together, creating an atmosphere that fuels their passion and deepens their connection.
In a whimsical and playful twist, some partners have ventured into the world of food play, incorporating edible delights into their intimate activities and adding a dash of sensory delight to their encounters.
For instance, some were applying melting chocolate, ice cream, or honey during the clitoris job, and most ladies interviewed said that they enjoyed it.
Exploring the World of BDSM: Embracing Pleasure, Trust, and Consent
In a world where sexual expression is constantly evolving, a community is breaking the barriers of traditional norms and embracing BDSM, an acronym that has captivated curiosity and stirred debate.
“To demystify the often-misunderstood lifestyle, individuals are opening up about their experiences with Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, and Sadism and Masochism, emphasising that it’s about more than just physicality; it’s about connection, trust, and consent,” Ciru said.
BDSM, a consensual form of power exchange, allows individuals to explore their desires and fantasies through role-playing and various sensory experiences. For some, it is a profound journey into their emotions, exploring uncharted territories that enrich their intimate connections with partners.
Experts in human sexuality emphasise that while BDSM may involve elements of restraint, pain, and dominance, it is crucial to distinguish it from abuse. Communication, boundaries, and consent play integral roles in these relationships, with participants establishing “safe words” to ensure a mutually enjoyable experience.
“For me, BDSM is a dance of trust and vulnerability,” said Ciru, adding, “It’s about handing over control to my partner and feeling safe doing so. It’s liberating and empowering.”
Dominant partners also speak of the fulfilment they find in the dynamic. “Being dominant is not about exerting power over someone; it’s about accepting the responsibility that comes with that power. My sub’s trust is sacred to me, and I cherish our bond,” she said.
Though the BDSM community faces stigma, more individuals are embracing their authentic selves and advocating for understanding and acceptance. Local BDSM clubs and online forums, for example, have emerged to promote healthy practises and provide support for those interested in this lifestyle.
“I’ve met some of the most compassionate and respectful people within the BDSM community,” remarks Jane, who identifies as a switch (someone who enjoys both dominant and submissive roles). “We prioritise open communication and consent above all else, which creates an environment of understanding and acceptance.”
All those interviewed said that as society evolves and conversations about sexuality become more inclusive, it is crucial to respect the choices of consenting adults while promoting responsible exploration.
They added that understanding the dynamics of BDSM is essential to debunking misconceptions and fostering a culture of acceptance for diverse forms of sexual expression.
For some, the allure of exhibitionism and voyeurism brings excitement and thrill to their sexual escapades, finding joy in the intimacy of being watched or watching others.
In the pursuit of deeper connections, mindfulness and tantric practises have become essential elements of intimate exploration. They bring partners closer, fostering a level of intimacy and understanding that goes beyond the physical.
And for the daring and adventurous, changing the backdrop of passion and trying new locations adds a thrilling sense of excitement to their encounters, creating lasting memories in the process.