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Why I would never date a baby daddy

Girl Talk

Would I ever date a baby daddy? No, thank you! Baby daddies are high up on my “men not to date” list, right next to ex-convicts and drug addicts! It baffles me that a woman in her right mind would consciously choose to date a man who is a father of a child not of her womb.

Baby-daddy-ville is hostile territory which you enter at your own risk. It is a package deal in which you get him, the mama and the kid; and the baggage that comes with that is real and shouldn’t be played down. I sincerely sympathise with these desperate women (you’d have to be terribly desperate to date a baby daddy) who get involved with daddies and go out of their way to impress boo and his kids. It is pathetic.

I especially pity the women who date serial baby daddies. The fact that he has multiple baby mamas, none of whom he has ever been married to, is really not a red flag to you? Are you trying to be baby mama number four? It doesn’t feel weird when he tells you he has to go pick up his third child who is really his first child with baby mama number three?

Come on, how can you overlook that mess? If you date a baby daddy, you will never ever come first in his life. His children will always be his first priority, rightly so. He will cancel dates and romantic trips if his children need him. Now, part of the reason why my relationship with a baby daddy wouldn’t make out is because I am an extremely selfish person.

I demand my man’s undivided attention under any circumstances. Having said that, it wouldn’t feel right if the man I am dating has to cut short quality time with his child because of me. Let us not forget the ever present issue in a relationship with a baby daddy; baby mama drama.

The reason most baby daddies are ostracised is not so much about the baby as it is about the baby mama and the subsequent drama that unfolds when she finds out that the daddy has started dating a new woman. Generally speaking, baby daddies never have a healthy co-parent relationship with the child’s mother.

The baby mama will go out of her way to sabotage your relationship and she will make your life hell if not actually succeed in breaking the two of you up. Most baby daddies are cowards and will go along with whatever the baby mama wants to avoid conflicts.

She will always have an excuse to intrude into your lives and there is nothing you can do about it. She will use the children to manipulate him and maintain some control over him. When baby mama calls your boyfriend at night when he is with you and asks him to go over because of some child-related issue, you bet your life he will go because he has a responsibility to his child. Where does that leave you?

When dating a baby daddy, you will never be wined and dined at five star restaurants or taken or luxury vacations. Most of his money will go to his baby mama. Why would you put yourself through that when you can date a baggage-free man who will splurge all his money on you? You do not have to endure the baggage, stress, competition or guilt that can come along with dating a baby daddy. There are a lot of fish in the sea.

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