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Baby daddy: Setting boundaries when you are not in a relationship with him.

Baby Care - By Everlyne Muchoki | May 13th 2017 at 09:40:00 GMT +0300
There are dads and then there are fathers.

Not many times is the name baby daddy associated with drama like baby mama. A baby daddy is just seen as someone who has kids with more than one woman. The guy who always comes up with excuses why he has not provided for his child but will always want you in his bed.

Wait! Before you start judging, I am not talking about all baby daddies. Some guys are doing a really great job at raising their kids. They are there emotionally, financially and physically for their babies. These are dads and not fathers.

Lost? A dad is someone who is part of his kid’s life and does everything for him despite him not having a relationship with the baby’s mother. A father is one we would basically say just contributed to the existence of the baby.

You will always know if a guy wants to be part of his baby’s life. How? Do his friends know he has a baby? Does his family know about his child? Is he providing for his son? Is he spending time with his daughter? Does he call to just ask how she is doing? If he is not doing any of these, you need to start having boundaries.

Today we talk about setting boundaries with the baby daddy. Some of the boundaries you need to set are:

  1. Your relationship: Stop hoping for something more

If he never wanted to commit before you got pregnant what makes you think he will want to do that today? Stop hoping that he will come around. Yes he may come around because he’s changed but baby girl don’t be the one who pursues him. If a man wants to be part of your life nothing will stop him.

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  1. Discuss what co-parenting means

Let it be known to both of you what co-parenting means. Be on the same page with him. Have a sit down and let it be known to him what you want. Boundaries means that your conversations are only limited to your child, cause that’s what you have in common.

Don’t let emotions blind you because you have a child together, be open minded because at the end of the day it is about your child. Set boundaries where you know what you want. A person should never walk in and out of your life and bed whenever they please. It will only confuse you and your baby. Remember that your child comes first.

Let it be clear to both of you if you can enter into relationships with other people. Your life shouldn’t stop just because you had a baby. We are human beings and we crave love. You can see other people but let him know because big possibility is your new relationship will need to meet your child.

Never let your feelings get the best of you. The person who is most important is your child.

Co-parenting is very possible. But it takes two people who put their egos and pride aside for the sake of their child. You should never have to force anyone to be part of something they don’t want to be in. But if he wants to be part of his child’s life, let him.

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