The art of a good marriage

Congratulations!  You are a few days away from buying the T-shirt that reads “I survived yet another 365 days of marriage!”

Seriously though, for all those who started the year married and are ending it still married, my hat off to you. I’m thankful that together we have navigated sometimes calm, sometimes choppy waters of marriage and we have docked at the harbour of 2012 safe and sound.

For some, the navigation has been done with more tears, while for others, laughter has over-run their home. If your marriage in 2012 was tear-filled, take heart, you have the opportunity in 2013 to turn those tears into rainbows. If you’ve been laughing all the way, then do whatever it takes to keep that laughter going. Laughter thieves are many, some of whom we can do nothing about but, as soon as you can, revive that joyous sound.

I stumbled onto the poem hereafter and what struck me most was that if all we ‘marrieds’ tried to adhere to what the poem says, then marriage wouldn’t be a matter of survival; it would be absolutely enjoyable. So here’s to 2013 and taking our marriages to the next level. Happy New Year!

Circle of love

Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created.
In marriage, the little things are the big things. It is never being too old to hold hands. It is remembering to say “I love you” at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is at no time taking the other for granted;
the courtship should not end
with the honeymoon, it should continue through the years.
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.
It is standing together facing the world.

It is forming a circle of love that gathers the whole family.
It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. It is speaking words of appreciation
and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways. It is not looking for perfection in each other.
It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humour.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow old.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is establishing a relationship in which independence is equal,
dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal.
It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.

- Wilferd Arlan Peterson