Millions of children left behind as parents migrate for work, study

Such experiences raise questions about how migration policies can better account for the children who remain behind. [Victor Bwire]

Millions of children worldwide are being left behind when one or both parents migrate in search of work, education, or better opportunities, with impacts ranging from beneficial to detrimental depending on the support systems available to them.

A UNICEF working paper, Left Behind, says parental migration can affect children’s development, economic circumstances, opportunities and overall wellbeing. Yet policies governing migration and labour mobility often pay little attention to the children who remain behind.

Families in Kenya are feeling this, as parents increasingly leave the country for employment and studies, creating families separated by borders, time zones, and long periods of physical absence.

For seven-year-old Maryanne Nyambura, the reality is captured in a simple prayer she made during a recent virtual family meeting.

“Dear God, we thank you for having a good day in school with our teachers and friends. This evening I pray for my sister and my parents who are far away. I pray to God that one day, He can help us to be in one Big house together,” she prayed.

Maryanne and her 13-year-old sister, Grace Njambi, live and attend school in Mombasa under the care of a close relative. Their father is studying in France while their mother works as a health professional in Ireland.

For Maryanne, the physical separation has been difficult to understand. She has kept an artwork for the past six months that illustrates her dream of having the family reunited.

The artwork depicts three smaller houses, each representing the countries where members of the family live, alongside a larger house labelled “My Dream For My Family.”

“This is where I want us to be together, me, my sister, mum and dad,” she says.

A family spread across three countries

For Njambi, the separation has been equally difficult. Their mother moved to Ireland in January 2025, followed by their father’s move to France in September that year.

“As a family, I remember when I was about 11 years old, my parents shared their plans to move abroad one day. Little did I know that it would turn out to be a prolonged physical absence,” Njambi says.

Technology has become an important link between the family members.

Through WhatsApp, they communicate regularly through audio and video calls, maintaining a form of parenting that takes place virtually across three countries and three time zones. But technology cannot entirely replace physical presence.

Njambi recalls going for lunch with her father after Sunday Mass, describing the outings as one of the ways they connected as a family. She also misses the moments her mother would plait her and her sister’s hair every two weeks.

“Every two weeks, mum used to plait our hair together with my younger sister, thus giving us a special girls' talk vibe, just us speaking about everything. Now we have to go to the salon, which I don’t envy so much, but we have no choice,” she says.

Despite the challenges, Njambi acknowledges the role played by relatives caring for them in Mombasa.

“One thing I am grateful for is the support we receive from our relatives in Mombasa. They have tried to understand our needs and we have been gradually coping well despite our parents not being physically present,” she says.

‘Why are you leaving without me?’

For 11-year-old Shareen Makena, her mother's departure for Greece brought a different set of questions.

Makena was left in the care of a nanny as her single mother prepared to travel.

She says she only learned about her mother's plans after relatives and friends gathered at their home for Thanksgiving prayers about a week before the departure.

“I quite didn't understand where it was coming from,” she recalls.

Confused and feeling excluded from the decision, Makena called her mother's employer to seek answers and even asked whether the employer could stop her mother from travelling.

“I really wanted answers from my mum’s boss why she was being allowed to travel outside of Kenya without me,” she says.

Her mother later spoke to her openly about the move and what her departure would mean.

Although Makena has continued to communicate with her mother through WhatsApp, she says virtual communication cannot replace the physical affection she misses.

“But mum, all I need is you because I miss you so much. You used to hug me each night before I go to bed. I can't express my feelings when talking to you on the phone, but I know we shall reunite and I will hug you tightly every day and be one family again. Mum I love you,” she says.

The family has established a routine of communicating online, helping maintain their connection and hope of eventually living together again.

The psychological impact

Loice Noo, a child and adolescent psychologist with 17 years of teaching experience, says children experience parental separation differently depending on their age and stage of development.

“When there is a gap in a child's development because one or both parents are away, it is very difficult to reverse it because it's a done deal. By the time a parent sees the effect of the gap, the child has already developed their own relationship,” Noo says.

She says parents need to prepare children before leaving rather than making migration decisions without adequately involving them.

One approach, she recommends, is involving children in parts of the migration process, including taking them along when attending visa appointments or embassy visits, so that they can understand what is happening.

According to Noo, inadequate preparation can leave children believing they are responsible for their parents' departure.

“Children interpret that there is something wrong they did to mum or dad when they left without proper preparations. They will not understand that being left behind is because of the rules and regulations,” she says.

She adds that one of the major consequences can be difficulties in building trust.

“They will not trust adults, trust relationships, families and even the environment where they are being left,” she says.

Policy gap

The UNICEF working paper notes that international frameworks recognise the importance of keeping migrant families together.

Article 44 of the International Convention on the Protection of the Rights of All Migrant Workers and Members of Their Families calls on states to take appropriate measures to protect family unity.

However, the convention has limited global participation, with only 54 states party to it and 13 having signed it, according to the material provided.

In Kenya, the Labour Migration Indicators Report 2024 highlights migration trends, employment patterns and protection of migrant workers as part of wider efforts to address unemployment and improve livelihoods.

However, the experiences and needs of children who remain behind receive far less attention.

For families such as Maryanne's, Njambi's and Makena's, migration is not simply a story of employment, education or improved economic prospects. It is also a story of childhoods lived across borders, birthdays and family moments experienced through phone screens, and children waiting for the day when a virtual family becomes a physically present one.

Their experiences raise questions about how migration policies can better account for the children who remain behind, and whether children themselves should have a voice in shaping policies that directly affect their lives.