Dude's Den: 'Special purpose’ men that sly Kenyan women keep

By Owuor Duya | 3yrs ago | 3 min read

**Men easily get trapped into these kinds of ‘parasitic relationships’, and assume all is well until things go south.**

For most a month, a male friend, let’s call him Calvin, dated a lady from his office. It was, however, strange that his new ‘girlfriend’ only called him whenever she wanted to go out to dance the night away or when she needed someone to chauffeur her and friends around town.

Calvin even started calling her his girlfriend even though their dates consisted of car rides about town in the dead of the night, of course at his cost. I felt sorry for him. I could not, for the life of me, understand why he was slow in realising that what he had with the girl was not a committed relationship, but some sort of ‘arrangement’.

Men, since time immemorial, have mastered the art of dating many women at a go. And they even get pats on the back for getting it in with every girl they get their hands on.

Today we are living in a different world; women have also put their best foot forward.

They now have multiple partners, and the partners have different roles and strengths. While men often ‘multi-date’ for the sake of curiosity and variety in sex, women do it because of convenience and to make their lives as comfortable and fulfilling as possible.

A woman will have one main boyfriend and many other men on the side for different purposes and uses. Or she will have many boyfriends with none being ‘special’ in any way.

And so, while Calvin looked like he had just lost his best friend, I do not think of him or men in general as victims. It is not rocket science; if a lady only calls you when she needs something from you, then she simply wants that particular thing from you, not love.

But men easily get trapped into these kinds of ‘parasitic relationships’, and assume all is well until things go south. They wise up to it when it’s already too late. Poor souls.

Talk to any lady who is ‘playing the dating field’ and I assure you she has several men. These include the ‘taxi guy’ who is usually called when she needs a chauffeur; the ‘salon guy’ who gets a call at the beginning of every month when a lady needs to make her hair.

There is the ‘credit guy’ who always gets the annoying please call me text; the ‘electronics guy’ helps when there is a problem to do with household gadgets and gives free consultation on the best tablet, laptop or television to buy. He even helps to tinker with them when they stop functioning properly. Women also have the ‘male best friend’, the poor chap who has to listen to all their problems.

Last but not least, there is the ‘Blankets and Wine guy’ who comes in handy when she needs a partner for up-market events, you just have to put up with more floral than any man should be legally allowed to wear.

The list goes on it all depends on a woman’s needs and wants. So if you are a man and thought you are on top of things or better yet on top of the world, the opposite is true; the world is on top of you! Ouch!