'My jealousy of husband's love for our daughter drove me to the brink of suicide'

Every week, mum Zoe Richards waits for the telephone to ring... When she hears her beloved daughter Ellie’s voice at the other end of the line, a huge smile spreads across her face, reports the Sunday People.

The two women, who are also devoted best friends as well as mother and ­daughter, had lots to talk about last week as they excitedly planned their yearly trip away together.

But behind this warm family ritual lies a shocking past of seething jealousy – and outright hatred.

It was a powerful, gut-wrenching ­animosity that sprung from an ­extraordinary delusion.

For almost two decades Zoe, 52, was convinced that Ellie, 22, was trying to steal her husband Rob, 54, from her – even though he was Ellie’s own father.

It was an unnatural obsession that eventually led her to ­contemplate taking her life.

Now Zoe is back from the brink and adores Ellie.

The mum has an E etched on to her wrist, Ellie’s initial, to act as a constant reminder that her precious child is ­always near to her.

And she can open up about her shameful secret, talking candidly in the hope her words may help other women who are too afraid to speak out.

Zoe said: “Like any mum, I was ­overwhelmed with love for Ellie when she was born but just two years later I had become insanely jealous of her.

“Rob, my husband, had fallen in love with our ­daughter.

“It sounds crazy, I know, but to me it seemed just as if they were having an ­affair. It was difficult to acknowledge but I hated Ellie.

“I was so depressed that I felt as if she, my own flesh and blood, was another female competing for Rob’s affection.

“I would look at friends of mine playing happily with their children and have a feeling of loss.”

Until Ellie entered their lives in July 1992, Zoe and Rob’s romance and ­relationship had been a fairy tale.

Both were in their mid 20s when they met in 1988. The couple fell in love and were married the same year.

Zoe recalled: “I thought our lives were going to be perfect.”

They had decided early in their ­relationship they didn’t want children but their minds were changed years later in the light of his illness.

After nearly a decade of health ­problems Rob, a senior bank analyst, was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis.

Zoe said: “At the worst I was going to lose my husband and I would have nothing of him left.”

They stopped using contraception and Zoe was soon pregnant.

For some reason they believed they would have a boy and told friends and relatives their child would be called Alexander James.

But when Zoe had Ellie, all she felt was joy.

“I cried with happiness after the birth,” she said.

“It felt very natural to be a mum. Ellie was the spitting image of her father and like any loving parent he was instantly smitten with our little girl.”

Zoe breastfed her daughter and said she was “heartbroken” at having to return to work when the baby was six months old.

But suddenly her feelings took a sinister turn.

She said: “When I was at work, Rob and Ellie got closer and closer. It made me feel there was no room for me.

“She would never eat the food I made for her and I felt hurt. Eventually I gave up cooking.”

Desperate to build a relationship with her daughter, Zoe quit her job to work from home as a management consultant to spend more time with Ellie.

But instead of helping, her marriage began to fall apart as she became ­consumed by loathing for her daughter.

Zoe said: “We were once walking down the street and Ellie and Rob were hand in hand.

“I said jealously to Rob, ‘You can hold my hand too,’ but he just brushed me off.

“When Ellie was four and a half I sent Rob a love letter when I was ­working away from home so he’d think of me.

“I came home and it was on the side, ­unopened. Looking back now, I see he would have been busy and manic ­looking after Ellie on his own.

“But at the time it felt like somebody had thumped me in the stomach.”

A devastated Zoe began to fixate on the thought her daughter was driving a wedge between her and Rob.

She recalled: “I felt like we were two females ­competing for one man’s attention.

“I remember the first time she ­innocently slept in our bed when I wasn’t there.

“It felt like my heart was crushed. That was MY side of the bed.

“When I was at home, Ellie was annoyed that she couldn’t climb in to bed with us. This continued until she was ten years old.

“To me it was as if we were fighting for the same man. I felt she effectively took my place in the household.”

Today Zoe finds it ­difficult to talk about her feelings at that time.

She knows it is an admission most ­parents will find absurd.

It is painful for her to admit that by the time Ellie started school their ­relationship was cold.

Zoe said: “Ellie would sit in the front seat of the car. And when the three of us went out to cafes she would kick me under the table.

“She would tell me to shut up if I tried to talk.

“It broke my heart. But Rob wouldn’t say anything.

“He genuinely didn’t notice. Other people would just think it was lovely that Ellie and her dad were close.

“I remember an old lady in the street telling me, ‘Your daughter is such a credit to you.’

"She was well-behaved and ­outwardly we seemed like any other ­family. But inside I was falling apart.”

With no one to confide in, Zoe became increasingly depressed.

The one dark day in October 1997 she drove to a beauty spot to take her life.

The trigger had been seeing Rob and Ellie, then five, play with toys in the lounge – a happy family scene most mums would be overjoyed with.

Zoe’s voice became a whisper as she said: “I parked up facing the sea, waiting until other people had gone.

"But by the time the cars had all gone I realised I couldn’t leave Ellie with that stigma.

"No matter how much I felt I hated her, deep down I didn’t really.

“I went home, made a cup of tea and went to bed.

“It was a good way to hide away.”

Having reached rock bottom, Zoe asked for a divorce on her 35th birthday.

“I resented the attention Rob gave her. Back then I couldn’t see that she was just a daddy’s girl and their relationship was perfectly normal.

"I told him I wanted a divorce that day and his reaction was one of resignation.”

Zoe and Rob put their home in Ormskirk, Lancs, on the market.

At first their separation was amicable but after a couple of months Rob told her he would fight for custody of Ellie.

She said: “I felt trapped in the house then. And we had two years solid of nasty rows.

"There was no sex life and I grew to hate him. We had a super kingsize bed with separate duvets. My relationship with Ellie was non-existent.”

But as time went on, Zoe slowly began to see more clearly – and realised she had to fight for her marriage and to regain her daughter’s love.

She said: “Rob and I opened a shop together and I stayed at home more. And I started to take Ellie to school more often.

"We slowly had moments together.

“Rob was finally diagnosed with MS when Ellie was ten. He needed me – he hadn’t needed me before – and that helped.”

When Ellie became a ­teenager she grew ever closer to her mum.

Zoe smiled as she recalled finally seeing an end to her pain: “Ellie needed to discuss things with me, like boys and ­periods.

"Last year Ellie, who wants to be a university academic, married her childhood sweetheart.

Zoe said: “I was proud as punch on the day. Rob is still incredibly close to Ellie but I don’t have an issue with it any more.

“I feel so much guilt over wasted years and I’m just happy Ellie didn’t give up on me.

"Deep down I ­never stopped loving her and I know now that she ­always loved me.”

And Zoe has set up a website, Love Lemonade, to help other women who have the same terrible feelings.

She said: “I think this is happening a lot and it’s never talked about. But I want them to know there’s nothing wrong with them if they’re feeling like this.

“One woman emailed to say that at the time a friend sent her the link she had been planning on taking her life. Then she realised she wasn’t alone.

“If all I’ve done by creating that video for the web is save that one life, then speaking out is worth it.

Rob said: “I was aware Zoe sometimes felt like the third person in the ­relationship but she was very career-orientated and Ellie always gravitated towards me.

"She demanded attention and I felt it was ­important she got it.

“I don’t recognise some of the specific examples Zoe remembers. I might have been oblivious to it.

“When you’re a father with an only daughter you’re very protective. But I can’t imagine my life without Zoe.”

Ellie added: “I was quite young so I probably didn’t realise what was ­happening. But I remember having lots of tantrums when my mum and dad were thinking of splitting up.

“Growing up, my relationship with my mum was up and down. Now I’m best friends with both my parents.”