Am I outgrowing men my age, or are they getting boring?

Am I outgrowing men my age, or are they getting boring? (Photo: iStock)

Hi Chris,

I love dating! All the fun, the partying and the nightlife. The high heels, short skirts, deep necklines, bare midriffs and sexy lingerie. Dancing all night, laughing and flirting. But I’ve noticed that as I get older, the guys my age are getting boring! And so I’m having to date younger guys! What’s going on?

Partying

Chris says, 

Hi, Partying!

There’s nothing wrong with partying! Especially if you’ve no intention of getting married anytime soon.

But once a guy gets a little older and realises he’s ready to marry, he starts looking for a wife rather than a girlfriend. And so he chooses a girl who wears slightly more demure clothes and enjoys quieter dates.

Because more mature men find party girls hard to please, endlessly craving something new, going out to get wasted and spending half their time online. So a man who’s thinking of settling down chooses the girl who’s growing out of all that and who’s also settling down.

Girlfriends are belligerently independent. They mostly talk about each other. A girl who’s ready to marry will want more intellectual conversations. She’s always widening her horizons, meeting people and exploring new possibilities. She’s passionate and driven. Girlfriends haven’t reached that point yet and are still finding their way in the world.

You eat salads, but admit it, that’s mostly about creating an image of healthy living. A man who’s thinking of settling down wants a girl who’ll genuinely enjoy a burger and chips with him and who spends more on her food than on clothes.

She’ll still be lots of fun and won’t have entirely forgotten all her crazy times as a girlfriend. She’ll still be a wildcat between the sheets and play video games and enjoy walking around the house naked. But she’s also mature and confident and has lost all her youthful insecurities.

So by all means, enjoy the wild nightlife for now. But the guys who’re around your age have started looking for wives rather than girlfriends. So leave them be, until you’re also ready to marry.

All the best,

Chris