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The difference between falling in love and a crush

To love is beautiful thing and to be loved is even better (Photo: Courtesy)

The heart can be very complicated. One day you think you’re in love with someone and the next, your heart says you’re not.

The truth is that it can sometimes be very confusing to figure out whether someone you’re interested in is the person you really want to be with.

What makes it a puzzle is that a crush and real love can at times have them same characteristics and the last thing you would want is to rush into a relationship when it was merely puppy love.

However, you can always learn how to differentiate the two. These are five ways you can use to tell the difference between real love and a crush:

  • Love develops over time

If you have had a crush on someone before, you probably remember how you felt the first time you saw them. The feelings escalated quickly and within a short time, you could already picture how amazing dating them would be.

When it comes to real love though, you don’t always have the initial connection with the person you’re interested in. The feelings develop over time because you slowly come to appreciate who they really are.

  • A crush focuses on shallow qualities

When you’re infatuated with someone, you don’t actually have a deep understanding of who the other person is.

You will be focused on the basic qualities you like about them like their smile, their looks, their swag or charm and at this stage you have no idea if they have those qualities that make a relationship work.

A crush will give the shallow impression that the person you like is wonderful, perfect and amazing, and that is very different from true love.

Love is calm, patient and consistent with what you want (Photo: Courtesy)
  • Love is calm

Both love and infatuation can fill you with a rush of emotions. But when it comes love, there will be a calmer and more peaceful connection as compared to a crush.

If you’re experiencing a powerful wave of emotions that make you feel like you can’t breathe, live or even eat without your crush, it might not be real love.

  • A crush doesn’t last

A crush quickly comes and goes. It feels more intense but the flame always dies out quickly.

At first, it might feel like you’re one hundred percent sure about being with the love of your life (apparently) but with time, reality kicks in.

The fantasy you had built in your mind has no real foundation and that is why it can never be compared to real, long lasting love.

  • Love is more intentional

While love is focused on building a real relationship, a crush feeds on the excitement of right now. Both of them can feel refreshing but infatuation will want to keep the fun times going until it the feelings die out or shift to someone new.

When you’re smitten with someone you will feel like you’re meant to be just because you have the same taste in music or share the same birthday month, and basically, there is no real purpose.

If you’re really in love though, you will understand that it’s not about an exciting, magical experience. Your focus will be on the bigger vision for your relationship.