Met folks have mastered the art of conveying the expected in a most unexpected manner

Nairobian brave short rains and cold in the City ahead of expected El Nino as predicted by the weatherman. [Elvis Ogina, Standard]

Folks at the Meteorology department say the rains are coming, but they are so muted in their pronouncements, it's hard to hear what exactly they are saying. But before we get to that, let's appreciate the new vocabulary, such as "sea surface temperatures," that I hear are lurking.

"This rain will be distributed fairly in some areas and more evenly in others, both in timing and location," said David Gikungu, the big boss at the Met. And I was left pondering who "distributes" the rains and what does it even mean if the rains are "more evenly" distributed in some areas. What about timing? Are we not in the same time zone?

Where I come from, we say a person who has not mastered her language is bound to betray herself. But folks at Met long mastered the art of obfuscation so that we're not even remotely aware what to expect. And we're happy to receive whatever nature unleashes on us.

If the grim prediction is that the El-Nino rains, which last descended in the 1990s and washed away just about everything, before returning to clear what had been restored in 2002 or thereabouts, then the Met should be telling us exactly that.

But since "timing" is about everything, and here I use the phrase to convey manoeuvres that require a bit of precision-like a tenderprenuer soliciting a government contract-such deals aren't easy to manipulate when we're not in crisis mode.

So, we have a few more weeks to let things hatch, and for Met to figure out the meaning of what they have coded for us. For they don't know if what they say will come to pass, even though they have some inkling of what might not happen. And if it does, who cares? That's nature's way, isn't it?