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When women cross the line

EVE WOMAN
By TONY MOCHAMA | September 28th 2013

By  TONY MOCHAMA

Last Saturday, at Westgate, at about 11am, I was reading The Saturday Standard as I dipped my dinky doughnut in my ‘Art Caffe’ coffee latte.

Ok, I was nowhere near there, that was just a ruse to grab your attention, the same way a story on that Saturday’s Standard grabbed my attention with the headline ‘Why Faith is probably the happiest wife on Earth.’

In a nutshell, it was the true story of one Faith Wairimu who was arrested about 100 days ago for the attempted assassination of her husband John Muthee, with whom they have two children.

Faith had paid undercover cops Sh40,000 deposit to shoot her hubby three times in the head. They pretended to do so, and took his blood soaked clothes (from a nearby butchery) to her, upon which she paid them the Sh160,000 balance for the blood work. She was then arrested, charged, and faced a life sentence in prison.

Shockingly, this was the third time she was trying to get John murdered, without success, and it seemed luck had run out on this evil woman, the case a no-brainer.

But if you did not believe in kamute, you may start believing now. Two weeks ago, at the Milimani Law courts, John Muthee withdrew the case against his estranged wife (who tried to kill him thrice) claiming he was doing so for the sake of ‘the children and my family.’

His decision stunned men, women and I am sure even children across the region, like a stun grenade. Yeah, sure, Faith said she had found faith in the Lord (doesn’t every other killer in prison suddenly discover Jesus?) but how could John have faith in this woman who had tried to get him shot three times, three times?

They say faith moves mountains. Sometimes, it even flies Faith over mountains. Because John has now taken Faith over the mountains and across the sea for a second honeymoon to rekindle their vows — like the vow Faith made for death to make John part.

Presumably this second ‘honeymoon’ is being funded by the monies John Muthee gets as rent from the properties Faith wanted to kill him for. I don’t know about you, man, but why do I find it hard to buy into this fairytale? I have heard of ‘make-up sex’ but this, this is extreme, Akim.

If your woman has ever tried to get you killed, my advice wouldn’t be that you should follow Mzee Muthee’s  shocking example. It would be that do unto others what they would do you in. Kill, or die trying.

The story of a certain long distance runner is still fresh in my mind.

Remember the man who threatened his wife with an AK47, then she ‘forgave’ him? I was at Carnivore restaurant that night when she invited the press for their reconciliation Valentine Day’s dinner.

A few months later, he forgot he was a marathoner and did the high jump off a balcony, in the process landing dead on his head. And leaving her a black widow — with millions in the bank.

Have faith, Faith, fourth time’s a charm.

 


 

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