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Finding intimacy in the honeymoon

By GARDY CHACHA | September 8th 2012 at 00:00:00 GMT +0300

It takes more than sex to achieve a deep connection and synchronisation of feelings during the honeymoon, writes GARDY CHACHA

Apart from the wedding and the celebration accompanying it, the next beautiful thing couples look forward to is the honeymoon.

Ideally, this is where couples begin their intimacy. Make no mistake: Sex and intimacy are two separate nouns. The latter means a deep connection or synchronisation of human feelings, which are then relayed outwardly, while the former can sometimes just be a mechanical act. Being in love does not guarantee complete intimacy.

If total intimacy is not realised during a honeymoon, then it probably will never be achieved during marital life. But that doesn’t mean all honeymoons are stamped and flipped, certified for pure bliss. It can only be as good as you push it to be.

Here is how to ensure you have the perfect honeymoon and achieve ultimate intimacy.

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A few months before the honeymoon, prepare by adopting good eating habits and exercise. This will help keep your skin looking radiant and your hair nice and shiny.

It’ll also condition your body’s overall health and prepare you for any excursions, such as snorkelling, hiking or swimming under waterfalls. For the first day of the honeymoon, pre-order breakfast and spend the whole morning in bed, eating, cuddling and watching a romantic movie or just yip-yapping sweet nothings.


Staying active will help you burn any extra calories. It also ensures your body is within the right body mass index, which gives you the confidence and freedom to express yourself physically to your partner. To add on that, if a chance to spoil yourselves intimately avails, then you go ahead, even if it involves downing a fatty morsel.

Body grooming

I don’t have to mention that cleanliness is a virtue. However, there are hidden mistakes that if not emphasised could spoil the intimate moments.

One, make sure that he has had a recent haircut and a nice, clean shave before your trip. For both of you, it would be nice to shave the intimate – but usually hidden – places so that growth of bacteria and fungus under sodden and warm conditions is not promoted.

Oral health

You will want to have a fresh breath and soft, kissable lips. It would be advisable that you use a soft toothbrush that rids your mouth of food debris without causing micro-wound openings. Before you go to sleep, after you brush your teeth, brush your lips as well using warm water. This helps exfoliates your lips. Right after, apply a healing lip balm. You’ll wake up with soft, healthy lips and a breath fresh enough for a morning kiss.

Have body and verbal conversation

Plan in advance to massage each other, beginning with the therapeutic skills, and then slowly fade into passionate touches.

At the same time, try sharing your hidden secret fantasies. Share your deepest and perhaps darkest desires. Sharing fantasies doesn’t mean you have to act on them, but once you’ve talked about them, you can keep them in mind for the rest of the honeymoon lovemaking.

Love poem

Even if the talent of writing wasn’t bestowed on you, you can pen down a soulful poem that will overwhelm your spouse with happiness.

You could begin with the reasons for your love and lace them with a poetic touch. If you’re worried about how it sounds, ask a close friend or confidante. You could do different poems for dinner, a cocktail, breakfast time or when you are just relaxing next to a pool. Whatever your style, this will be a treasured memory for your spouse.


This may be the best intimacy advice for any honeymooners. Don’t rush into sex. Take time to talk while you snuggle, cuddle and kiss.

Don’t worry about any problem back at home or be afraid of your partner’s perception now that you’ll be getting intimate. Just enjoy each other and resist the worries and apprehensions.

It doesn’t have to be perfect the first night. The love and care you shower on your partner will melt them inside. Good lovemaking starts with focusing on making your partner happy.

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