Ukrainians waiting for peace before having children

Locals bottle drinking water at a water distribution point in the town of Bilytske, Donetsk region, on March 3, 2025, amid the Russian invasion of Ukraine. [AFP] Oleksandr, a Ukrainian soldier, dreams of being a father to a girl and a boy. But, as fighting against Russian invaders rages on, he is putting off having children. Instead, he said, he will freeze his sperm -- a hedge against the daily risks he confronts on the frontline, where he has been since the start of Russia's full-scale offensive in 2022. Though his wife Kateryna lives in the Czech Republic as a refugee, Oleksandr was adamant about the family life he envisages: "I also want to raise my child, not just leave them with my partner." The ideal setting would be all of them living together, in the mountains, surrounded by "lots of cats". But wartime reality makes that dream a distant prospect. "I can't just do what I want," acknowledged the 36-year-old, who spoke to AFP on condition his last name not be used. The logical option, then, is to do as many of his fellow soldiers have done, and freeze his sperm. New legislation means that, from this year, Ukrainian soldiers can do so for free, and many clinics are already offering the service. "Who knows what could happen?" Oleksandr said, pointing to the risks of reduced fertility due to combat stress -- or that he might be killed. If he dies, Oleksandr said he wants his wife to use his sperm to become pregnant. It is an "insurance policy" Oleksandr finds reassuring, even if struggles to imagine his wife having their child without him, and prefers not to discuss "sad things". The most important thing for him is that Kateryna, 33, can have that "choice". "I know she loves me a lot. I love her a lot too," said Oleksandr, adding: "Everything will go well". Freezing for the future Ukraine was already in a demographic crisis before the war, but the Russian invasion has made it much worse. The UN estimated in October last year that the country's population of 43 million in 2022 has dropped by nearly 19 percent. According to the UN, the birth rate is less than one child per woman -- one of the lowest levels in the world. The government is worried, but hoping an end of the war will usher in a "baby boom". Many civilians are also freezing their eggs and sperm in anticipation of a better time to have children in the future, although the exact number is not known as there are no official statistics. The Feskov clinic in Kharkiv in northeastern Ukraine said many more civilians were freezing sperm and eggs -- procedures that were rare before the war. Vladyslav Feskov said the demand comes "in waves". Demand rises every time the war takes a worse turn. The clinic has remained open despite unrelenting Russian strikes on Kharkiv, a city located close to the border with Russia. It now has an underground laboratory and all the genetic material is stored in a secret location as far as possible from any Russian drone strikes, Feskov said. Skype dating? Daria Chernyshova, a 23-year-old student, recently had her eggs frozen. She said the prospect of becoming a mother in wartime is "very frightening". At one point she delayed her decision to freeze, hoping that Russian bombardment of her country would ease. But she eventually came to see the procedure as "necessary" because "we do not know what will happen tomorrow". Chernyshova now lives in Kharkiv but comes from Lyman, a town in eastern Ukraine that she was forced to flee in 2022 as Russian troops advanced. She is left with traumatic memories of women rushing to evacuate, clutching small children in their arms. Currently single and dating, Chernyshova said she also wants to build her career and find a partner before having a baby. Her dating prospects have thinned because of the war -- and not only because of the undisclosed numbers of combat deaths and men who have left Ukraine. Recruiters patrol the streets looking for young men to put in uniform, making real-life dating difficult. "Where can we go to meet or do we just talk on Skype?" Chernyshova said. In the end, she said she may have to move abroad and "find a boyfriend there".

Ukrainians waiting for peace before having children

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