Jobless? High-end prostitution could be a rewarding, lucrative career

 It is a lucrative 'business' [Photo; Courtesy]

Are you tired of slaving away at a lacklustre job with little to show for it? Do you want to rake in some hard cash for very little effort?

Do not even get me started on the various perks you will get to enjoy - globetrotting on someone else’s money, business class plane tickets and vacationing in exotic locations while staying in luxury hotels.

Let me interest you in the lucrative career of high-end prostitution.

We have all heard of the staggering prices of high-end call girls. So, what are you waiting for? Forget about that Bachelor’s degree in psychology and teach yourself some hooker-nomics!

What you have between your legs could be your ticket to fame and fortune. It is time to start your own business as a self-employed prostitute.

All you need to get the ball rolling is a good bleaching cream, a sassy attitude and an Instagram account. The Instagram account will come in handy when advertising your ‘wares.’ Websites are damn expensive for nothing.

It is also where you get to announce to the world that your morals are negotiable and that you are a person of rare intelligence -  it is rare when you show any!

After that is set and done, brace yourself for a bank of degrading sexual activities with old, wrinkly, ugly men that you are definitely not attracted to. But hey, as long as the money is good who cares, right?

Ladies, stop seeking these get-rich-quick schemes.

You may put on that ‘I-don’t-care’ attitude, but you are not fooling anyone. It takes a huge emotional toll on a person when everyone is looking down on them.

The money you get from being an escort may be great, but you can’t put a price on dignity. You are better off vending bananas by the roadside.

Just think about how devastated your mother would be if she found out that you built her a house using money you got from selling your body.

Whether you prefer calling yourself a socialite or however else you want to sugarcoat it, prostitution is prostitution.

There is no difference between you and the girls walking the streets. At least the ones on the streets don’t try to hoodwink the public by putting on airs of self respect.

It must be tiring to always having to cook up elaborate stories of how you make your money.

If you want to sell sex for a living, own it. Explicitly tell people what you do for a living. Only then will we believe that you don’t care about what people think about you.