Dealing with shy men

                                                    PHOTO:Getty Images

By Wesley Kipng'enoh (@Wess_kipp)

You all know this type of men. A guy is cool, A-list swag; and is definitely every womans talk,  but Help You God, is as shy as an adolescent teenager.

 Such inherently shy men find it difficult uttering some words, let alone hugging a girl. So let’s not even talk about kissing and ‘bedminton’ stories because it is a no go zone for them.

 Well, how should women treat these men? I hear that shy men are arguably the best men. I don’t know how true that is. Here is the thing, they could be tight lipped or having some weird things going on with them, but trust me; they are good, when given a chance.

 I know of a friend, who was so shy, a chic gave him a peck on his cheek, he almost passed out. Had that woman taken him to the bed frontiers for a night, I assure you, my friend would be in real trouble; I think he would be  terrified to death. It was that bad.

How should we deal with them? I have suggestions that I think would really help deal with the men, allow me to represent them; to explain why I think they deserve more.

Be easy

Easy means you allow him to take control. It will build on his confidence. I am not talking about easy mathematic questions: NO, am talking easy bedtime matters here. Let him suggest some things so you can get a clue of what extent he is capable of going. If he gets a clue of how much an expert you are in bed, that will definitely make him retreat. He could be lethal in bed!! Who knows, so basically don’t demand.

Be gentle

In your outings, your dates, it’s important to try and be gentle. That way, he will be feeling free to open up. Where I come from, if you roughly touch a heifer that has not ‘met’ a bull, that heifer will give you a hell of a kick! Shy men are like that heifer (except for the kick); they will revolt if you speed things up. Go at his pace, he will catch up and may even beat you at your own game.

Do not corner him

Conversations are important and sometimes you want to find out more about something that might have popped up in your chat.  If he says no, don’t press further, he probably can’t go further than that. He feels naked if he tells you some of the things.  Trust me he will open up some day as when he gets familiar with your company.

Compliment him

If he is smart, well-dressed, nice outfit,you get the jist... please tell him. He will blush, stare away, smile, sweat, develop wet arms, but eventually you will be building on his self-esteem. If he kisses you for the first time, don’t go bananas, please appreciate his effort. That probably took 99% of his love and emotional reservoirs.

But hey, do not let them take advantage of all these. So, be alert for any signs of him playing sneaky, but remember to be careful handling him, otherwise ‘utaachwa na mataa’