Big Man syndrome is the condition that’s preventing Prezzo UK from sleeping well

I have been thinking about Prezzo UK’s recent pronouncements that hardly make any sense beyond being amusing to me. But since they were not meant for comic relief, I feared I was missing something.

In one moment, Prezzo is lambasting civil servants for not taking pay cuts, in the next he is blasting foreign governments for discouraging their citizens from touring the country.

In another moment, he is condoling a bereaved family, while miraculously remaining on the phone to issue a roadside declaration to one Mike Sonko, effectively stopping a demolition in progress. And before Sonko disconnects the line, Prezzo is on the road to champion domestic tourism.

Such is his itinerary, and we haven’t even started reflecting on his nationwide tours to adjudicate over various Government projects, personally meeting his team with both enthusiasm and warmth.

On such occasions, he rubs his hands together, as though he is itching to greet someone, almost always accompanied by a smile that shows he is enjoying himself. But the smile hardly lasts in his addresses, and his hand-rubbing gestures quickly degenerate into hand-throwing antics as Prezzo’s tenor shifts to an angry roar.

From his own admission, we now know Prezzo’s jittery manner stems from inadequate sleep, for he says he is having sleepless nights as he works from one crisis to another.

He seems unable to grasp the meaning of rhetoric from his Western “friends,” the ones that warn about “consequences,” yet routinely invite to banquets only meant for a select few.

There was that meet with David Cameron, the British premier famous for those schoolboy stunts like taking selfies when adults are mourning and who flatly refused to take any pictures with our democratically elected leader.

The latter attribute is used deliberately to remind Western detractors that, contrary to their widely held view, there are functioning institutions in this part of the world that can guarantee stability and continuity.

That said it might be useful to remind ourselves that the national electoral body, Independent Electoral and Boundaries Commission admits they were operating at 50 per cent efficiency – and that’s only a self-assessment – which means their true worth must have been far below.

But I’m digressing. What I mean to say is that since there is no a crisis over the legitimacy of the Jubilee administration, Prezzo does not need to try too hard to be the Father of the Nation. That goes without saying, unless of course he is suffering from the Big Man syndrome, which is manifest by a desire to oversee every aspect of the citizens’ lives. I think that Prezzo’s preponderance to promote the country as a safe destination for tourism, even when idiots are detonating explosives every few minutes, works very well to enhance his business-oriented administration.

That’s consistent with his Government policies that demonstrate little empathy for watu wa mapato ya hali ya chini (ordinary folk) who cannot afford patronising the tourist establishments now lying idle.

Further, Prezzo has to cut through the tomfoolery delivered by his Western “friends.” This is how the British Government informed its citizens to shun Kenya: “The FCO advises against all but essential travel to Mombasa island and within 5km of the coast from Mtwapa Creek in the north down to and including Tiwi in the south. This area does not include Diani or Moi International Airport.”

Perhaps they expect Prezzo to take the Big Five to the airport and given his restive state, I wouldn’t be surprised if he did. The Big Man can manage the Big Five.