The scarcity of virgins

If a time traveler was to go back to Ancient Greek and offer them a chance to travel back with him into the future, they would furtively decline. Their refusal would stem from a myriad of reasons, but chiefly because in this century there is a scarcity of virgins. So who would they sacrifice to their gods, they would ask.  

Plenty has certainly changed from the time when women had to keep their virginity intact or risk being buried alive until now where by seventeen most women and men have had sex.

For a while now, like bell-bottom jeans, virginity has been slowly losing its appeal. It is no longer a trait that is desired or injected into youth. The question is no longer, “how goes virginity?” but instead “dude, have you lost it yet?” In fact, virginity has become like an illness one has to get rid of it as soon as possible. This notion has been relentlessly propagated by the media. According to Western media the preferable age to lose one’s virginity is sixteen for girls, and fifteen for boys and the best way to get rid of it is prom night. Failure to lose one’s virginity then results into a miserable life.

In reality, today most men rarely concern themselves with the virginity of a woman. Even though it still carries negative consequences in many cultures, it is no longer deeply frowned upon. Instead, many have recognized that to impose restriction against sex is futile, and as a substitute have opted to educate their children on protective measure.

A recent study by Journal of Child and Family Studies that was carried out indicated that even virginity pledges have become useless. In other words, these religious promises do not guarantee abstaining from sex until marriage. It becomes especially hard to regulate virgins, because there are still no clear guidelines as to what it means to lose one’s virginity. It can’t be just the tearing of the hymen, it is therefore a complex term incorporating a variety of actions.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to be sexually active. It is a rite of passage for all young adults. However, the problem arises when people start to see virginity as a handicap. Virginity has been rendered into a curse of some kind, to the point where it is now being used to mock or ridicule. Thus, one finds more and more teenagers rushing into sex not because they want to or that they are ready, but because being a virgin is synonymous with being a loser.

Currently young adults are hiding their virginity, nervously stammering out excuses as to why they are still virgins. This should not be the case; there is nothing wrong with being a virgin, either by religious affiliation, choice, or the lack of opportunity. Ultimately, feminists should not discourage one’s decision to be a virgin with their sexism speeches, nor should religious leaders pressure young adults into abstaining.

In the end, it is really a personal decision. Whether, as a woman or a man, the pressures and expectations of society should not force you to engage in sexual intercourse. In truth, the recent rise of the process of ‘re-virginizing’ illustrates that virginity is still very much a sought after attribute.

‘Re-virginizing’ can include a surgery called Hymenoplasty, which is basically the reconstruction of a female’s hymen, or a re-commitment to a celibate lifestyle for both men and women. There is no denying that currently virginity is seen as a constraint to the freedom of expression. Still, it doesn’t mean that those who actively choose the path of abstinence are prude, naïve, losers or religious fanatics. It is hard to adorn virginity proudly in this modern age, but it is nothing to be ashamed about. It is a life choice and no one, society, pastors, media, should turn abstinence into a laughable exercise.