Man pays dearly for sipping a ‘drink from outside’ at sports pub

There was ruckus at a popular pub in Nyeri Town, when a drunkard who had sneaked alcohol from outside the bar, contrary to “management policy”,was busted and forced to pay for the drink.

On the material day, the pub was teeming with activity as a high number of revellers swaggered into the joint to catch the World Cup action, and it was impossible for “security” to frisk all the revellers for external booze and weapons.

The guy, who would later serve as a lesson for the like-minded, took advantage of this confusion and sneaked in with a bottle of potent liquor hidden in his pants.

Once safely inside, he retreated to a strategic lonely corner of the pub where he made an order for the “soda madiaba” and demanded for a transparent glass instead of a straw.

While making the soda and glass order, the chap made it clear that he ought to be treated as a “first-class citizen”, just like those who drunk expensive alcohol at the bar.

“Umenye ni andu taithue tuturagia kirabu giki.Koguo ureke nyue gathoda gakwa na thayu (You should know we are the people who run this town. So you must let me take my soda in peace),” he said, chortling with glee as the barmaid placed the soda on the table.

But as soon as the barmaid rushed to the counter to serve other customers, the guy whisked out his bottle of liquor and emptied part of the content into the glass before adding droplets of the soda.

Most revellers at the club must have been wondering what type of “soda” the customer was drinking given his contorted facial expression whenever he took a gulp of the drink.

He would take a measured sip of the drink, contort his face and vigorously shake his head as he swallowed the contents.

Interestingly, the more “soda” he drunk, the louder he became at spectating and commenting on the World Cup match showing on the pub’s huge screens.

He would make a funny facial expression whenever the barmaid passed by his table and would break into a hearty laughter every time he spotted other revellers ordering expensive drinks.

“Mangai twatandika mundu ngumugurira inyuothe cuba (I swear I will buy each of you a bottle of beer if we beat this team),” he said, taking a measured sip of his concoction.

Just then, revellers at an adjacent table who had ordered an expensive mzinga of whisky asked the barmaid to bring them a plate of lemon slices to flavour their drink.

EXCHANGE INSULTS

But as soon as the barmaid delivered the fruits, he too demanded his plate of lemon, insisting he was a customer just like the rest.

“Nikii matunda maraheanwo na kimenyano. Tandetera tutunda onani thondeke mumero uyu ni muthako munene (Why are fruits being distributed with favouritism? Bring me some so that I too can open my throat. This is a big game we are watching over here)!” he said.

The barmaid, unwilling to exchange insults with the seemingly inebriated chap, brought him the lemon slices as ordered – but unknown to the drunkard, “management” had keenly been watching him.

And so when he stood up to leave after tactfully dropping the makali bottle under the table – he was whisked away by a pair of beefy bouncers and forced to pay an inflated fine for flouting “management policy”.

He has not been spotted at the bar ever since.