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The legend of supermom: the things only a mother could ever do

Parenting

There are things I never thought I could do either because they seemed ridiculous or just never crossed my mind. I entered motherhood, and I discovered super powers are not a preserve of TV heroes. Far from fiction, scientific explanation does cite that mothering behavior is triggered by biochemical reactions in the brain, which explains a few unusual things that only a mother can do.

Sucking a baby’s nose

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Have you ever had the experience of a baby with a blocked nose in the middle of the night? If you haven’t, you wouldn’t understand how one would deliberately put their mouth on a nose full of yellow slimy mucus and perform their own version of suction. Stranger is the fact that when a mother does this, her gag reflex is sort of turned off. They don’t even feel disgusted. It’s all in a day’s work, the end justifies the means.

Poop master

Prior to having my baby, I didn’t know there was so much you could learn from and about poop. When I saw my baby’s first stool (meconium) I was so shocked, the doctor had to be called in. Who wouldn’t be? Black stool? - I thought my baby had internal bleeding! That was the beginning of my poop education, and countless diapers in, it turns out there is a whole science to it: smell, consistency, volume, frequency, color! And don’t for a second think mothers are crazy or have a poop fetish when you are exposed to their poop journal. When you visit the doctor, they will ask you, “When did your child last pass stool? How often does she go? Was it formed or watery? Was it mucousy? Did it have a foul smell? How much was it?” You become a poop specialist. If I were a Marvel villain my name would be Madame Poop!

Who, Me?

It’s only natural to put yourself first. It is the premise for survival of the fittest and every man for himself. However, the maternal instinct is so deeply ingrained in our psyche that if someone put a gun to your child’s head, you would easily trade positions, no doubt. You wouldn’t even need to think about it. That’s a worst case scenario, but the same applies to mundane activities; a mother might set out to buy a little something for herself, only to return with baby clothes only, or give the last meal to her child and sleep hungry. To a mother, her child comes first. Always.

Inquiry 101

The questions you have to answer from your child are only comparable to a cross examination or an encounter at the Pearly gates. Kids have questions about questions; and each question is a trap - answer one and you trigger three. Mommy, can I fly? No baby. Why? Because you don’t have wings. But Tinker Bell has wings? Yes Baby, but people don’t fly. But Tinker Bell is a girl? Yes baby, but she’s a cartoon. What about Spider-Man? Spider-Man is also a cartoon. No, Spider-Man is a boy and he can fly without wings! Baby, people only fly on TV, Ok? Mommy, how did the son of God go to heaven? God gave him powers to go up. So God can give me powers to fly? One of a mother’s super powers is answering these patiently, every day. 

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