Don't be a jerk: 10 ways to be a good customer

I started off with the Customer Service in Kenya intro. We can all agree in this one, for the most part, and I mean 98% of the time, the service sucks!

But before we can venture into my series of customer service in different sectors, how about we start with how to be a good customer.

Yes, lesson 101 on how not to be a jerk when you are asking for good service. And please note, the customer is not always right. 

Basic courtesy. Start with Hi/Hello/Sasa and accompany that with a smile tafadhali. That automatically sets the mood for a good experience. Unless of course the waiting staff totally ignores that, then we will deal with them in the next few editions. Say thank you every time they bring you a menu, or drink or serve your food and when they clear your plate afterwards. Say thank you when an attendant directs you to the proper aisle in a supermarket.

Stop yelling! Trust me, your yelling only aggravates the situation and make you look foolish. Remember that you are dealing with a human being just like yourself. Prone to mistakes in your order or even emotions. Explaining your dissatisfaction calmly to the person serving you is bound to bear more fruit. It is also okay to ask for the manager when you feel you are not making any headway with the waiting staff…once again do it calmly.

Stop bullying. No one cares who you are. We as Kenyans have embraced this notion of “Do you know who I am?” often said with a sense of air and self-importance. Belittling those who serve you is counterproductive and it’s quite honestly stupid. If you were so powerful you would be getting the service in your own house.

Understand to be understood. Before crying bloody murder over a late meal, seek to understand why the meal is late. Sometimes it’s beyond the waiting staff’s power. Sometimes the menu or stock is unavailable for reasons beyond them. Once you understand the back story, it becomes easier to decide your next course of action.

Adjust your expectations. No really, if you have strolled into an establishment where washing hands is a community affair at a wall next to the lavatories, don’t yell asking for hot towels to clean your hands. If you have visited a high end establishment that only offers very fine dining, don’t go grumbling to the waiter as to why they do not serve matumbo (I am a lover of matumbos by the way). Observe the environment and appreciate what they serve… question the quality of course but appreciate what they serve.

Obey the rules. If they say cash only, do not rant and rave about why they don’t take credit cards. If they say do not spit on the sink… do not spit on the sink. If it is an express checkout for less than 5 items, do not take 15 items and stand there with a ‘whatever’ look.

Your kids, handle them. Now this is a touchy subject. Much similar to not speaking out when a rogue preacher jumps into a bus and starts preaching to a non-interested and irritated crowd. Now, our babies, lovely as they are, can be a nuisance when they are throwing a tantrum or are just irritable. Remember that there are other people who are in the establishment to enjoy the experience. A kid kicking chairs, yelling, rushing from table to table kicking over bowls. Believe me, I have seen it, a lot, it is not pleasant.

Respect the prices. We Kenyans are prone to having witty comebacks for expensive products. Phrases like "ati nyama kilo 800/- kwani hiyo mbuzi ilipigania uhuru?" Are not uncommon. No use making a fuss over what you cannot afford, move right on to the next affordable establishment.

Address them by their names. Dale Carnegie once said that a person's name is to him or her the sweetest and most important sound in any language. If they are wearing a tag, address them by their name as you ask for whatever you need. The interaction instantly changes to something more cordial.

Leave a tip. I know it is not common practice in this country of ours. But you don’t need to be reminded to tip. Yes, the staff is getting paid but so are you and yet you jubilate over that bonus. Same thing, if you receive exceptional service, leave a tip for the good job. Trust me, you will get even better service the next time round.

If you do this and still get crappy service, walk with me in the next few editions as I address how to do customer service right. 

Read more of Njambi Mungai's articles on her blog