Move over boys, it's a girl's world

There has been a long held belief that this is a man’s world. But going by what we have witnessed this December, we are convinced that is a fallacious belief perpetrated by the women so that they can have their way as they mislead men into thinking that they are in control.

The month of December has become the traditional month to walk down the aisle. In this month my pal Frao and I have had to rush from one wedding to another as our friends and acquaintances took the vows with their soul mates.

As we battled Nairobi’s infamous traffic from Ngong Road hoping to make a brief appearance for yet another wedding on Kiambu Road, Frao said that when it comes to December there is a near stampede for people to get married.

He even cited a number of service providers who will charge you an arm and leg simply because your wedding is in December. “Push forward your wedding to January and you slash half the budget” Frao shouted as he braked hard barely coming shy of a few inches of a matatu near City Mortuary.

“This guy wants to get me killed her and I’m taken just across the fence” I thought to myself. But just why do many people have such a strong attraction to weddings in December?

Frao argues that there are a good number of women who wake up in December and promise themselves this time next year, I’m getting married. According to Frao, the big number of women actually make this decision after attending many of their friends and often age mates and former school mates weddings.

So are you saying the decision to get married does not lie with the man, it is the woman? I challenged him. “Of course!” he insisted. “The date of marriage is very similar to having sex. It is the girl who decides whether it is going to happen tonight or not,” he explained.

Seeing that I was getting a little puzzled, he continued “ Tony, you want to tell me that all this time you have been thinking that it is your prowess that gets you laid?” he sarcastically posed.

“It is never that way, the womenfolk are always in control and we can do nothing about it” he continued. Even Sila our brother, you think he even chose the colour scheme of his wedding, leave alone the date? Never, it was all decided by the missus. Sila is the guy whose wedding we were rushing to on Kiambu Road.

When we go to this wedding, a number of decisions will be made this afternoon by the unmarried women in the crowd, the fruits of those decisions will be realised one year later.

If men had their way, we could have a small wedding ceremony preferably on Friday afternoon where your pals just pass by on their way from work. Pick a few biscuits and juice, serve some snacks and a few shots of scotch whiskey and that’s it. But boy... which girl needs such.

The girls use the wedding to try and outshine each other in very same the men will use their fast cars to out shine each other on the highway. So what is the moral of the lesson? If you have not done that flashy wedding and your partner keeps attending weddings every Saturday in December, something is being schemed.

She is merely doing ‘window shopping’ and you could be the victim trying to look happy on your wedding day but inwardly cursing the expenditure that came with it.

photo:thegrio.com