Single women put off suitors

By Brenda Kageni

A throng of women gathered at KICC last weekend in the hope of receiving the miracle of a husband and a working marriage.

I will not chide them for being open enough to believe that one man had the miraculous answer to their prayer for a life partner.

I, in fact, do not totally close the door to the idea of heavenly intervention when it comes to marriage.

We know people, for whom it will take God for marriage to fall in the picture.

That aside, the more religious of us believe that a good man and a good marriage come from God and if it is going to take a preacher from Oga Land to create that divine connection, so be it.

But when we get back to the drawing board, we still have all these women looking for life partners.

And we have all these men around.

cool to be a bachelor

Why are we finding so few viable marriageable men among them?

What is it that we are looking for? Or is it that Kenyan men are doing so badly at being husbands that we might have to cross the border to Somalia or Tanzania?

I would surmise it to a few things.

First, Kenyan men no longer find it trendy to get married. Being a single hot bachelor regardless of one’s age seems to be a new ideal for adults.

Our men love being free to roam and the have the convenience of chips fungas to take care of their small needs.

They do not have to have big expenses of paying for maternity bills and childcare or paying big rent for a house that can take in the nanny.

So why get married?

Secondly, we women have become stubborn. Correct me, but marriage comes with changes many of them unwelcome to our liberated minds. Who wants to rush home every evening because dinner has to be made?

Who wants to start referring to another human being for all decisions including whether or not to buy a blender you want?

Finally, we are not that great. Yes we dress well, have nice jobs, and speak good English, but when it comes to character, we fail terribly.

And there is nothing like marriage to bring out all the flaws in us. We have a man everyday to remind us how selfish or impatient we are.

We are looking for great men; but great men need great women. We can’t blame them for taking a peek and running, instead preferring to keep to their boys and tech toys.