Sexual harassment at work: These jobs have the worst records

A standard advertisement for a househelp mentions a number of qualifications. Age, experience, proof of citizenship in the form of an original ID and, usually, a list of the specific jobs he/she will be expected to carry out. Cooking, cleaning, looking after the kids and others.

What most advertisers fail to mention is the silent qualification, a feature of most households and the worst-kept secret in domestic management: if you’re applying for the job of a househelp, you must be ready to deal with a potentially randy employer.

Domestic workers: Men take advantage

Expect wandering eyes that linger and wandering hands that pinch or grab. Expect inappropriate comments and conversations filled with innuendo. Expect the rattle of your bedroom door knob at 3am.And if you survive all that, expect the man who pays your salary to slither into your bed one night when his wife is away.

“It’s part of the job,” admits Phillis Nyagoha, a househelp who has been in the business for over 10 years. “I have been lucky compared to some of the other maids I know, but we’ve all had employers who tried to take advantage of us.”

“My last employer didn’t seduce me directly, but he used to watch me while I was working, and if his wife wasn’t around, he came into the kitchen and brushed against my body while I was mopping.

“I think his wife suspected him, because she started being strict with me. She insisted I only clean the bedroom when she was around. She made me cover up completely around her husband, and she never let me serve him,” says Nyagoha.

The wary wife can hardly be blamed. Husbands sleeping with househelp stories are a dime a dozen.

Service industries: Hotel, restaurant and clubs

But househelps are not the only workers who have to worry about a sexualised environment. In several jobs, particularly in the service industry, a little sexual energy is considered the norm. As anyone who has worked in a hotel, restaurant or club will tell you, it is a tricky business, waiting on hungry people.

“May I take your order,” sounds innocent enough, but it can still be misconstrued. When you factor in the short, figure-hugging skirts these ladies are supposed to be in, and then add to that the instruction to smile and charm the customers, that can invite some lonely man to go fishing.

Monica Wangari, 33, is a barmaid at a popular joint along Moi Avenue in Nairobi.In the three years she has worked there, the mother of one has seen it all.

“It is a very challenging job, it needs a lot of discipline because throughout the day we serve all kinds of customers,” she says.

Wangari adds that apart from playful men who misbehave once intoxicated, there are those who go the extra mile to seduce them using money.

“It is common to encounter those who get drunk and get the courage to touch you all over, putting us in the awkward situation where we have to show our true colours and at the same time not to lose a customer.”

At the bar and restaurant where she works, her job involves inspecting the rooms before guests leave and that is where another challenge comes in.

“Some men place wads of cash on the bed and request for a quickie in the room. Many girls have fallen for that but if one is morally upright, it is hard to do,” she reveals, adding that:

“Like all human beings, we also fall for some customers. In my case, I was attracted to a foreigner who used to come here, unfortunately, he was married. It is a job that requires a lot of intelligence and patience.”

Cabin crew

The long hand of the lecherous man reaches even to the skies. Another career that is not spared the sexualisation is that of the air stewards or hostesses.

Eunice Miki, an in-flight attendant for a private charter company, has had to fight to earn respect in what she sees as a male-dominated world.

“It’s not easy, especially being a woman in a man’s world, but at the end of the day, how you handle yourself and what kinds of principles you have really matter.  In my line of work, you have to be twice as tough to be respected.”

The sexualisation is subtle in her field, but present nonetheless.

“Men always assume that they can just have your number and some even keep giving out their business cards...or you’ll find someone complimenting you but within that compliment they start inviting you for coffee dates.”

How does she deal with all the attention?

“Declining politely with a firm face and tone of voice. You always have to sound and look professional even when you are showing the person that you’re not interested in their offers.”

It is even more challenging for her as she is in a relationship. Typically, jealousy would rear its ugly head considering her line of work, but her boyfriend works in the industry and understands that side of it.

“He understands my type of work and what morals I have. Of course, there is some jealousy here and there but we’re very transparent with each other which makes it easier,” she says.

Interns and PAs

The list goes on and on. From interns, who are treated as the shiny new toys from the moment they join the workplace, to personal assistants who are expected to be available for whatever the boss needs, even if he decides he wants a back rub. Even the professional masseuses are not spared.

Masseuse

“I’ve had clients come in and ask for simple massages, but then demand special attention to their private parts,” narrates Jolyn Kwamboka, a masseuse and wax specialist at a popular spa in the city.

“Some establishments offer happy endings, yes. Usually, the spas tell you this when you’re applying for the job, so it’s up to you. It’s not something I would personally do, but I understand people are different. I know some girls don’t mind it, if they can make a little extra money from it. But at the end of the day, what matters is your own code of ethics,” says Kwamboka.

It’s not just women who are under pressure either. Private security guards and bouncers constantly have to fight off amorous women who are drawn to their physiques and their calm, silent intensity. The fact that the typical bouncer can chuck them across the room only makes them more interested.

So, what is it about the service industry that brings out our most primal desires?

Power in sexuality

Dr Halimu Shauri, Associate Professor of Sociology at Pwani University, believes sexuality plays a role in how we like to be served.

“There is power in sexuality,” he explains. “Some say there is spirituality in sexuality. The human soul finds solace and peace where there is spirituality. You go to a bar where there are beautiful women because you find peace.

“You board an airline where there are nice girls so that when you fall asleep she can adjust your head and it feels nice. Even in hospital, you would much rather be attended to by a female nurse. That is the power of the woman, and people have learned to take advantage of it.”

Inevitably, he admits, the sexual attention can easily veer into harassment territory. But this is part for the course:

“That which is called harassment may be predetermined when that person is going for the job. They are rational enough to think about what the job demands. It is not just about making money, you have to consider your own morality, your personal integrity.

When you accept that job, it means you’re inviting the eyes of the men. You’re justifying the behaviour that happens there. There is this thinking with men that when you go to the bar, that the women there ‘should know’. They have already accepted the advances. You don’t need to seduce them, by virtue of them working in that environment, they are going to be touched, whether intentionally or on the pretext of being drunk,” says Dr Shauri.