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An African security guard. (Courtesy)

If you want to know who sleeps with who at your flat, just befriend the night guard. He also knows who is broke and whose stima imekatwa and who sneaks in langas at 3am. He also knows which flavour of condoms the guy in house number 20 prefers. But those who guard business premises in the city centre are special. They see stuff and most times keep mum so as not to mwaga unga. Here are 10 things night shift security guards will tell you about when they're drunk.

  1. The colour of hooker's ngotha

City hookers and security guard are joined at the hip. Flesh peddling happens at a night club or in the cold streets and to change from normal to nguo za biashara means building relationships with watchies to allow them change in seconds before whistling for clients along City Hall or Kaunda Street.

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