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A memo to male comrades: Don’t kill for love

By Silas Nyanchwani | April 18th 2019
Naftali Kinuthia in the holding cells at the Eldoret High Court on April 15. He is accused of killing Ivy Wangeci, his alleged girlfriend who was a Medical student at the Moi University School of Medicine. [Kevin Tunoi/Standard]

One of the few guarantees of life is that a girl will break your heart in your 20s. She will leave or cheat on you with a richer or more handsome man. In the current age, the other ‘man’ might as well be a woman. She may despise you, and boy, there is nothing that stings like contempt from a woman you love, more so when she is looking for an excuse to dump you.

All men, our fathers, the yuppies in their 30s and the middle-level managers in their 40s in blue chip companies have been dumped, played, abused by women they loved and would cross oceans for. The break-ups were painful. Some even incurred material losses.

Nevertheless, these men survive and if you ask them, they might shock you when they admit that the break-up, despite having been in love, is the best thing that happened to them. Soon or later, they met a woman who genuinely loves and respects them and they started a family. Life went on.

Listen up people, being dumped is part and parcel of life. It is not a license to do something silly like going on a murderous spree. A real man will mourn privately, share the predicament with a few friends, and carry on. Learn on the reasons she has dumped you.

If it is because you are broke, work harder and you will meet a more beautiful girl down the line. If it is your bad personality, try to change. If it is your looks, then learn to deal with it. Whatever you do, avoid violence. A lifetime of guilt as you feed on jail beans is not cool, and neither is ending your life.

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