'Phubbing', the worrying new phone 'trend' ruining relationships

Whether you're in a bar, on a bus or a waiting room, it's become commonplace to see nearly everyone around you with their heads bent, scrolling away on their phones.

It's all too easy to reach for our phones when we're either waiting or left with nothing to do but stare at the wall.

But this reliance is becoming worryingly pervasive.

So much so, it's creeping in to our homes and impacting our relationships with our partners - and not in a good way.

"Phubbing"

As modern romance (or just bad behaviour) evolves, so does language and in the past year we've been introduced to a whole host of new phrases.

Bread crumbing and ghosting rest at the more benign end of the scale.

At the other reside more sinister practices, such as gas lighting and steal thing.

As for "phubbing," while it's by no means the worst thing in the world, it has an unpleasant cumulative effect.

So what does it mean?

A portmanteau of "phone" and "snubbing" it happens when someone, mid-conversation, will become more absorbed with their mobile than with the company they are in.

It's bad news for relationships because it can dramatically diminish our satisfaction with the one we're in.

"There are three important connection factors that will give us a sense of satisfaction in our relationships. The first one is accessibility, that you're both open and listening to one another," Julie Hart from The Hart Centre tells WHIMN.

"The second is responsiveness, as in you both empathise and try to understand how the other feels, as in 'get’ each other, and the third is engagement, so you're both making the time to be fully attentive to each other.

"Phubbing interferes with all three of these important factors so it's no surprise to me that people are feeling less satisfied with their relationships because they're just not having quality time.”

"And they're not feeling their partner 'gets' them or is there for them because there's always this constant distraction away."

All is not lost, however.

If you recognise that you're a phubber - or if your partner is - there are some boundaries which you can set to help your relationship.

Julie advises, "Sit down together and set out some rules about phone-free time, where you basically put your phone away somewhere where you can't hear it, for a full hour every night while you and your partner spend some quality time together."

She also suggests having the bedroom as phone-free environment, as well as meal times and when in the car together.

"Most people would be amazed at what a dedicated hour a day of phone-free time can do for their relationship over time," she says.