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Stop chasing after men for babies, go to sperm bank

By Njoki Kaigai | March 12th 2017

Once again, thanks to WhatsApp, I stumbled upon a rather interesting ‘ad’. This beautiful woman has posted it looking for a man to sire her child and has given some enticing incentives to lure the man into action.

These incentives include food, clothes, an abode in posh Karen topped up with a monthly pay of 80,000 bob. Her demands are rather basic and easy for most men to meet — youth (18-35 years), ability to have sex daily and ability to vanish once she achieves her aim of conception.

Based on this ad, it was very clear to me that this lady must be either beautiful and daft or beautiful and forgetful. When it comes to procreation, we all know that women run a rather more covert operation when it comes to choosing who will father their children to this.

In addition to this, they do not spend tons of money in getting men to do their bidding — some home cooked meal, some flashing of skin and cleavage and some good tipple is enough to get a man to unleash his seed for your use. There is absolutely no need to keep the man in the know regarding your intentions about his sperm — after all men lose millions of sperm daily without any consequences.

For my dear sister who seems to badly want a child, here a few things you need to know. To begin with, before you go looking for a man to procreate with, you must decide what child you want to have. Do you want to have a good looking child or an intelligent child or to have both?

As we know, people get ahead by either using their good look or their wiles. So you have to be sure that your seed donor provides at least the good looks — for science has proven that intelligence comes from the mother. Once you have decided what you are going for, then you can begin your search — no use going into all this effort to deliberately increase the number of ugly and daft people in this world — we already have enough.

Another thing my sister needs to know is that being youthful does not automatically make you a good seed generator. Just like in employment, there are some men who are just good sperm donors.

The is because they have good genes, good looks and they also like to dish them out quite generously.

This young lady needs to look for men who have a demonstrated a track record of making babies — and good babies for that matter.

In this regard, married men are the best samples — since they will have enough samples and evidence from which you can make a decision. This young lady needs to look for married men who are ideally under 50 (I hear male seed from men over 40 is a bit sluggish in doing the job).

She should then look to see the profile of the children the man has produced — are they good looking? Are they smart? As we know, even married men in Kenya like to have unprotected, no-strings attached sex. They can therefore do the task with minimal costs.

This young lady needs to refer to her Biology notes or to watch Natgeo to understand the science of mating and procreation. Having lots of sex does not translate into conception — rather having just one round of sex at the right time makes a baby. So, there is absolutely no need to have a man live full time with you, no need for you to feed and dress him 24-7 when all you need is a minute to get the job done. Perhaps, this young woman is just using the quest for a baby to mask the fact that she just needs a good lay. Though I completely understand her need to have a baby, I think she needs to improve her fishing methods.

A quick visit to she sperm bank, where she provides her specifications, including her dos and don’ts, should do the trick. She can invest all the money she would have spent on her stud in doing something meaningful for her child.

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