There comes a time a man has to fight

BY ZAWADI LOMPISHA

We recently got a distress phone call at 1am from a friend and immediately rushed to her place. Her husband had beaten her up and she was taking shelter at a neighbour’s. This couple is very special to us. However, in the last few years, we realised all was not well. Their relationship was in trouble and we have spent countless nights together trying to address  the problem.

After spending enough time trying to assess their issue, we finally realised the woman was the problem. She thought she had made it and was way better than her husband career wise and financially. That isn’t to say that her husband’s career was flagging but she was way ahead of him. Her husband is her number one fan and has taken loans, baby sat the children and done everything necessary to enable her to get to where she is.

Rumours began spreading around that she was cheating on her husband. We have all tried to intervene but in vain. The last straw for my husband and I was when we went out for dinner and found our friend all cosy with another man. She didn’t know we were there so we were able to study them from far.

As they walked out of the restaurant, the woman saw us and suddenly stopped holding hands with the man. We had the terrible responsibility of informing her husband who kept holding onto hope his wife would change.

Harmless man

This woman is married to one of the gentlest men. He loves his family and will do anything for them. He wouldn’t harm a fly and is always in the forefront of peaceful resolutions whenever their is a family dispute. Anybody who knows him from childhood always attests to the fact that he has never been in a fight.

When we responded to our friend’s distress call, we found her hubby outside armed with a hockey stick. We calmed him down and he agreed to allow his wife to go to hospital.  The wife walked out with an equally wounded man — the one we had seen her with at the restaurant.

Apparently the husband had laid a trap and it worked. He had told his wife that he would be away for some days to chase some deals outside Nairobi. As usual his wife invited her ‘friend’ to the house. The watchmen who were already tired with her behaviour called her husband and that is how it happened.

As we ponder the way forward for this couple, here’s food for thought from parts of Kenny Roger’s song Coward of the county:

Everyone considered him

The coward of the county

He’d never stood one single time

To prove the county wrong…

I promised you, Dad

Not to do the things you’ve done

I walk away from trouble when I can

Now please don’t think I’m weak

I didn’t turn the other cheek

Papa, I sure hope you understand

Sometimes you gotta fight

When you’re a man