Girls under attack

At Mary Faith Children's centre beautiful smiles belie the trauma these young girls have gone through, writes NELLY OBADHA

From the moment you enter Mary Faith Children Centre you find a bevy of shy young girls chattering and giggling at their own stories. The jovial mood belies the harrowing experiences that these girls have been through in their lives. Many of the girls are victims of various forms of violence against them at quite a young age; and others had narrow escapes from their situations.

BELINDA*

At the age of 16, Belinda is in Standard Three. She is older and towers above the rest of her classmates. Belinda has just recently learned to talk afresh after the trauma she went through in the 2008 post-election violence.

When she was 13, she lost her family, was sold as a sex worker, molested and abused by a relative.

Where were you living during the post-election violence?

I was living in Molo with my parents, I am the last born in a family of four. Life was perfect and great before the post election violence; we had a great farm, and both parents were there to raise us.

What happened that led to you being here right now?

When the election violence began, all we got were letters from a neighbouring community telling us to move out of our farm. Not long after that, they began by robbing us of all our livestock and furniture alongside threats of how they would kill us all. One day their threats came true and we were actually attacked.

On the day of the attack, my father took me with him so we could hide together, the rest of the family was scattered and we didn’t know where they went at the time. We ran with my father into some bushes but unfortunately some of them saw us and came after us.

My father was beaten up and hacked by a gang of men with machetes as I hid nearby in some bushes and watched. I had to wait for them to go away then ran to my father. He was bleeding so much but still alive.

What took place after that?

I managed to get a neighbour who tried to help me get my father to hospital. By then it was still risky to be seen walking around. On the way to the hospital, my father was struggling to speak and all he kept telling me was to go home and take care of everything that belonged to us. He was also telling me that he is going to his father but then I didn’t understand what he was saying.

My father died in my arms before we got to the hospital. I was the only one who buried him; I stood at his grave as the only family member as I did not know where all the others were.

Where did you go after the loss of your father?

I was quite young and did not have anything on me; the only place I knew was home, the one place we had been attacked and the family separated. When I got there by good luck my brother the third born in the family was there.

My brother and I were the only ones there, my mother had ran away and left the town; my other older brother and sisters were never seen or heard of until to date. I don’t know where they are or if they are still alive. The gangs were still all over stealing and robbing people and it was not safe there.

My paternal aunt the sister to my father came and took us away to go and live with her in the same town but in an area that was much safer.

How was life once you started living with your aunt?

Living with my aunt was not any better. My aunt mistreated my brother and I. When my brother saw what was going on he decided to go find a way to live out of Molo. That was when things took a turn for the worst; my aunt’s mistreatment went a notch higher. There were days when I would sleep hungry or be thrown out of the house.

The worst part of living with my aunt was when I was sold as a sex worker and per day I had to sleep with two men. If I refused to do that I would be beaten up and burned around the thighs, private parts and stomach areas. It got really bad that the wounds never healed but still had to sleep with men who paid my aunt.

How did you manage to get away from her?

One day a young man in his twenty came to my aunt paid her and wanted to sleep with me. The moment he saw all the wounds I had on my body he never touched me but decided to help me escape. He was a resident of Nairobi but had gone to Molo for some business.

He later arranged and took me away from my aunt and brought me to Nairobi. He took me to a woman called Mama Mburu whom I lived with me for some time until she brought me to this centre.

How is life at the centre?

It is not easy as Mary the woman who takes care of us struggles to meet all our needs. Life here is much better than my aunt’s house and I even have people to call sisters here, girls just like me.

MARIAM*

At the young age of 15, Mariam managed to narrowly escape going through Female Genital Mutilation right here in Nairobi. Mariam hails from the Boran community which is still known to practise FGM.

Where is your family?

I am the third born in a family of four, when all this happened I was staying with my aunt. I grew up not knowing my mother whom I was told had died, and my father passed away when I was three years old. Living with my aunt was not bad as she treated me very well, took good care of me and even ensured I went to school.

What happened that led to you being at the Mary Faith Centre?

In 2009 when I turned 12, my uncle the brother to my father saw I was of age to go and get married off. I never even knew of the plans that had been going on until a few days to the marriage.

My uncle and the rest of my relatives had selected a rich man who was in his 30s to be my husband. They had chosen the man because he was rich and was able to pay the dowry that had been put on my head. Meetings had been going on for months and negotiations were coming to an end. I was even pulled out of school to be married off.

A few days to the wedding when I was being prepared my relatives discovered I had never been circumcised. This led to a lot of issues between my uncle, the man I was to marry and my aunt. My aunt was being asked why she had never taken me to undergo the cut but due to the fact that women have no say she could not counter this.

The man said I was not a woman and would not marry me unless I got circumcised. My uncle was in a rage as the dowry had already been paid and there was no way it was going to be returned to the man. The decision was made without my consultation or even the aunt who loved me and had protected me all this time.

From the little education I had and a program I had seen once on the television about Female Genital Mutilation, I knew this was something that was not recommended and would only end up harming me more than helping me in any way. I had seen the story of a young girl who had been circumcised and had developed a problem where she could not control her bladder well.

I was told about the circumcision a day prior to it. The next day quite early in the morning I woke up, packed up a few things and decided to run away from home. I had a little money on me and took a matatu to the home of a woman who had been my teacher in nursery school.

Rosemary the woman whose home I ran to that morning took me in and stayed with me for a few days before taking me to Mary Faith Centre for Girls.

CAROLINA*

Carolina, 14, is a victim of rape by a neighbour who pretended to be a good Samaritan in their neighbourhood.

I live with my father and stepmother. My stepmother mistreated us throughout and severally chased us out of the house on empty stomachs.

On one particular night, she beat me up and chased me out of the house. My father had gone to Uganda for a trip and was not there to talk her out of it. Most of the time though he would just sit back and watch everything from a distance and not rise a finger.

On February 19 last year she sent me out of the house, I was sitting there in the dark a young man in his 20s and had just recently moved into a neighbouring house came to talk to me. He appeared concerned as I explained to him what had taken place back home.

He offered me a place for the night and I accepted innocently. That night he forcefully had intercourse with me and I have never forgotten it. I tried to scream for help but I knew no one would hear or even come to my rescue.

The next day I woke up, went back home showered then went to school like nothing had happened. If I told my stepmother what had transpired it would only be more trouble for me so I kept it to myself.

After some months, I started becoming sick and vomiting. My father took me to hospital and that is when I found out I was pregnant as a result of the rape. By the time it was discovered it was too late for the pregnancy to be terminated.

My father insisted on knowing what exactly had led to the pregnancy. I told him everything that had occurred and the man was immediately arrested. My stepmother the same person who had thrown me out on that night insisted that we both get arrested but my father stood up for me.

I carried the pregnancy to term and gave birth to a baby girl on November 14 but she passed away on November 26. Every time I saw my late daughter I felt bad due to the fact that she was a result of the rape ordeal.

The whole incident is still painful and fresh in my mind. I am afraid of walking alone especially after dark. Every time I see groups of young men or I am approached by a strange man I get easily frightened.

Mary Faith Children Centre

Mary Faith Centre started in 2005 as a nursery but later turned into a drop-in centre fo children who had various problems. Founder Mary Njeri is a woman who at a very tender age was forced to undergo female genital mutilation by her grandmother behind her parent’s back.

Mary worked at government children’s office and during that time she saw what was happening and decided to help out. Through this she began helping many young girls who were abused and nothing was being done about it in any way.

Most of the time the girls who come in are sexually abused and either run away from home or bought by police who ask her to help by giving them shelter until their issues are resolved.

"Sexual violence is quite rampant and most of the time nothing is being done about them. It is the parents who will try and cover it up, the victims will not speak of what happened to them or some cases go to court and never win," says Mary Njeri.

*Names have been changed to protect the identities of interviewees, who are still under 18.